Today’s the only day of the year on which I’m absolutely happy with this horrible weather, because tonight I’m going to get on an airplane to warm and sunny Vietnam. That means a flight of about 13 hours and that means: easy and comfortable clothing. I know it’s forbidden to dress according to comfort, but these types of situations ask for a different approach. My suit of the day is a not too charming, but oh so comfy jeans with stretch, a big white t-shirt of H&M’s men’s department, paired with a vest and hoodie. Much to the chagrin of my boyfriend, and also my travel partner, because this is the same man that gave me a onesie with leopard print for St. Nicholas. And so he should be down with clothing like this, but unfortunately he isn’t. When I ask him why he hates my hoodie so much, I get a “because it looks like you’re lying on the sofa feeling hungover,” which is highly unsatisfying because I’m not lying on the sofa feeling hungover. Poppycock. Anyhow, now with the holidays many people will actually be laying on the sofa hungover, so I wondered, sweatpants, why do we like wearing that? And that onesie, where does the hype come from? Who thought of something lie this? And what are the rules if you want to go outside in a suit like this?

Whoever looks for answers on questions like these quickly end on Viva forums, where thousands of women debate about profound questions such as these. “Persephone83” says she doesn’t mind going out in a sweatsuit if it’s a hungover day, but only 500 metres. If she needs to go further than that, then she’ll put on jeans first. “Lapin” has eight sweatpants and every morning he wears such a suit to walk the dogs. Without underwear. So. The topic takes a bizarre turn of events when someone says that you can only wear sweatsuits when you’re a size 38 or smaller, and everyone soon screams and accuses each other. I exited the Viva forum and looked elsewhere for answers.

This is how I found out that 2010 was the year of the sweatsuit. The AD tells me that “thanks to the upcoming hip hop culture” the grey sweatsuit was bon ton, reason enough for FunX presenters Vincent Reinders and Delano Limaheluw (who doesn’t know them) to start their own sweatpants line. And quite successfully, within six months it was a great success about half of Ajax and Feyenoord soccer players were spotted in them, which further expanded the success of sweatpants. It also became a trend for women; harempants made from sweatpants fabric (I showed my travel companion some photos of these pants and his judgment, quite unexpectedly, was that it looked “disastrously. Like you’ve crapped your pants”).

I showed my travel companion some photos of these pants and his JUDGMENT, quite unexpectedly, was that it looked “disastrously. Like you’ve crapped your pants”

Odd thing is of course that sweatpants were originally intended to jog in. But funnily enough, there isn’t a piece of clothing on earth that is less used for jogging. However, you might feel the pressure to do something sporty in such a suit and so the onesie was born. Five years ago, three friends from Norway had an incredible hangover and felt horribly guilty for lying on the sofa, feeling miserable. That tight band around the hips was also less than great. The solution, so they thought, take out the elastic band and sow the upper and lower halves to each other. Et voila: the onesie was born. They founded a company, OnePiece, and put out an aggressive and successful ad campaign. Within a year and a half, about 2 % of Norway’s population walked around in onesies. The suit was an instant success, also for celebrities, and Cara Delevingne was soon spotted in onesies with elephant ears, or other weird stuff. With each photo that was taken, its popularity increased. One Direction, David Beckham, Justin Bieber, and Ed Westwick were all spotted on the street (!) in onesies and the damage was done: the onesie is here to stay.

Like I already said, my boyfriend gave me a onesie for St. Nicholas, as a jest. He doesn’t really mind that I wear it indoors in his presence, but the thought of me wearing it outside. “Well, I wouldn’t break up with you but I’d walk a long way behind you so that no one would notice we’re together.” That’s clear.

“Well, I wouldn’t BREAK UP with you but I’d walk a long way behind you so that no one would notice we’re together.”

It’s quite clear to me. Inside your living room’s walls, everything is allowed. Outside of those walls, well, not so much. Thing is, sweatpants are often associated with being hungover that you can just as well carry a sign that says HELLO WORLD I DRANK THE LIGHTS OUT OF MY EYES YESTERDAY NIGHT. And that’s not too chic. So, in order to summarise, first eat that great Christmas dinner, perhaps even in a onesie, but to walk to the pharmacy for extra alka seltzer, well, put on some trousers. Oh and about that hoodie, it’s of course incredible useful when flying. Enjoy your days!