NEVER GOING HOME

As I type this, and my somewhat shaky hands crawl over my keyboard, my eyes are mostly drawn to my wrist on which I see three VIP bracelets that gave access to the best night of my life: the EMAs, ánd the after parties. The night that changed me into the all-time fan of Miley and Katy, and my 12 cm heels and glitter trousers that brought me from after party to after party. Eventually, I rolled into bed at around 06:00 feeling dizzy of last night’s many impressions.

It won’t have escaped you that yesterday, the Ziggo Dome in Amsterdam was changed into the international podium that hosted this year’s MTV EMAs. I’d been texting hysterical OH MY GOD I CAN’T WAIT texts for weeks with the friend I was going to visit the EMAs with, and our built-up expectations were greatly surpassed. Katy Perry hung in the middle of the Ziggo (really, she hung) dressed in some disco ball which created a fantastic light effect. There was, of course, Miley Cyrus who opened the evening in a silver latex dress, together with a midget (really, a midget) in a black matching latex suit. Robin Thicke sang Blurred Lines with a dozen body painted but otherwise naked (really, naked) dancers, and Bruno Mars performed with practically naked pole dancers (yes, really).

Now the million dollar question, what were they wearing? Well, not that much. The dress code was ‘Out of This World Fun Party Alien’ and that is, honestly, a very complicated task. Iggy Azalea wore a dress from Dilek Hanif Couture with an extremely high split (so high that we saw more from Iggy than we wanted to). Miley wore an almost invisible, small dress and knee-length boots from Tom Ford, Ellie Goulding chose a lace, and so see-through, dress by Dolce & Gabbana and was practically naked underneath. And the host, Redfoo, quickly decided that the suit he was wearing looked better taken off and darted around stage in tiny glitter underwear.

The DRESS CODE was ‘Out of This World Fun Party Alien’ en that is, honestly, a very COMPLICATED task.

But, like R.Kelly already sang, after the show is the after party. When the awards were handed out and the Ziggo deflated, we headed towards the city in good spirits. We managed to get inside the Jimmy Woo where Robin Thicke’s after party was being held. But that was kind of a disappoinment and besides, the réal party was at Paradiso, the official MTV after party. After a failed attempt at bluffing ourselves inside (we thought that our Ziggo VIP bracelets would get us inside where ever we went, though the ten burly bouncers thought otherwise) we feared a serious downer to the evening. Right when we decided to take the hit and go home, someone whispered to us “do you want to get inside?” It was a huge man with a savage beard that introduced himself as Michel and he showed us a bag filled with bracelets. The bouncers let us in and we climbed on the stage and didn’t leave until the early hours. With the risk of sounding like an old hag, it’s been a long time since I last danced like this.

After about five hours of sleep, I’m incredibly slow, my legs feel like overcooked spaghetti and my ears are still ringing after those loud decibels. But I’m happy. And I know what I want to be when I grow up; a pop star.