how one word can make you ultimately happy

A few years back, long before we had any kids and oceans of time on our hands, my hubby decided to write a letter (okay okay, an e-mail but a letter sounds more romantic) for the father of one of his childhood friends.

The man in question had played an important role in his life when he was going through a bit of hardship, and for that, he wanted to thank him because he felt he had never properly done so. Before he knew it, he had received a reply from the man who had been so moved by his kind words. Something which made my hubby ultimately happy.

According to psychologists, this is something you need to exercise on the regular to become a happier person. Some of you might think it sounds a little out there, but the more frequently you express your gratitude, the happier you’ll become.

“If you happen to be the cynical type then I know what you’re thinking: happy people have more things to be thankful for.”

Just send a small ounce of gratitude to those you’re thankful for. It evokes positive emotions as well as a positive view towards the future. People sending out these positive vibes know less fear, are less likely to spiral into a depression, they’re friendlier and more empathetic, helpful, not envious and less materialistic.

If you happen to be the cynical type then I know what you’re thinking: happy people have more things to be thankful for. Well that is not how it works. After a ton of research, happiness has shown to be the outcome of gratitude. Plus, you can train your gratitude and henceforth your own happiness.

What do you have to do?

Something that works really well is writing down what you are grateful for on a daily, or a weekly, basis. I used to do this with old colleague of mine when we were going through some difficult times in the work front. We both jotted down ‘happy points’ into notebooks we had given one another. So although we had gone through quite a bit of anguish, there were also a lot of things we had accomplished. Like they always say, every cloud has a silver lining.

Another method, but a little less known, is the gratitude letter. There’s a story about a woman who had written her ex a letter in which she wrote how disappointed she was that the two of them had lost each other, but that she will forever be grateful that he gave her two of the biggest gifts in her life: their children.

I remember a wonderful woman who use to play golf at a golf club I worked at when I was still in college. She was absolutely stunning and had no kids. If I’m not mistaken, it was due to medical struggles she had had. When the Christmas holidays came knocking at everyone’s door, she always bought a huge bouquet of roses and gave  everyone who played an important role in her life one rose to thank them for all they had done for her in the past year. I would always pour her coffee on Saturday’s, for which she thanked me with a rose.

December seems like the most appropriate month to say our thank you’s. It’s free and it will ultimately make you a happier human being.