fear of phone calls

About a month ago I spoke with a friend about his new love. He’d been on a few dates and thought she was terrific only he wasn’t sure if she was into him. There was kissing, no sleeping and a lot of digital communication and even plans for a new date. Which she then cancelled. He was very confused, not buying her excuse that she was feeling ill. So I said: “Call her. Ask her how she’s feeling and if you can bring her some soup?” He laughed and said: “ No we’re not at the calling stage yet.”

And he’s not the first person to tell me this. I am a caller but there are not many like me. Most friends see calling as ‘the next step’. Kissing, sex, being exclusive, phone calls, exchanging keys, living together, babies and marriage. Something in that order. They see ‘calling each other’ as going to the next level. I once had a fling with a man person who pleasantly surprised me by calling me after our first date. He was a caller too. A guy that can send cute texts or Whatsapp messages easily scores ten bonus points but if he’s fun to talk to on the phone, he’s a winner.

Whatsapp can be beating around the bush; communicating about what you’re going to do that evening only takes three minute on the phone while texting can go on forever. Besides you can misinterpret each other’s texts, no matter how many emoticons you use. So I believe in picking up the phone. I don’t understand why people find it so scary. Do you have fun when you’re at dinner together or in the bar? Why should a phone call be any different?

If this sounds familiar to you and you have been texting your object of affection for weeks; get your phone out and do it the old fashioned way. Call him! It might be a little frightening in the beginning, but you’ll see, it’ll all work out just fine. Good luck!