Happy & Healthy
THE ‘I FIND MY KIDS ANNOYING AND WHERE’S MY WINE’ TREND
(and 5 tips on how to make it fun)
So I was at a birthday party the other day. A child’s birthday party. Even though I despise birthday parties, you have to make the effort to appear at one every so often. I hadn’t visited these people in ages and as soon as I got there I remembered why. All she did was yell out ‘no!’ and ‘kids, stop it!’ any time these tiny legs started sprinting and jumping around the house, followed by an eye roll and a silent but evident cry for wine. And all of this, while she continued her conversation.
Now I know that it’s very hip to vent about how annoying your kids can be. About how hyper they are and how you never seem to have any ‘me-time’. That they knowingly and willingly make your blood boil. And how your hubby can go to hell. I would just like to put this out there: I find this to be pathetic.
I get that your relatives aren’t always the most fun crowd to be around, and neither are you. And I also get that sometimes you just really need to vent. Do it, but do so with your man or with a good friend. Sporadically. Not in public. Especially not anywhere where your nosey little rugrats can hear you and ESPECIALLY not at a party.
“Especially not anywhere where your nosey little rugrats can hear you”
Complaining about your own kids isn’t funny, nor is it cool. Don’t sh*t where you sleep – it’s tacky and distasteful. People are going to be embarrassed for you, but hey, to hell with them; even worse is the message it sends out to your kids, whether or not you intended to. Here’s what you’re telling them: ‘Wine is more important to me than you are.’ Because like it or not, that’s all your left with by the time you’re done with your rage. That all you really want is wine. NOW.
Do you need some time for yourself? Make it happen. In the mood for wine? Treat yourself. And quit talking about how your four year old is purposely trying to spite you. The kid is four. FOUR. All she wants is more attention. Can you blame her? And while you’re at it, remember this: if you think your child is Satan’s little spawn, know that a child is the product of your upbringing. Brats? Nope, just a bratty mom.
“And quit talking about how your four year old is purposely trying to spite you”
I have a friend who deserves a medal for the way she raises her kids. She’s quite bohemian and the happiest homemaker I know. This is what I’ve learned from her:
1. Scrolling through your phone and shouting the occasional ‘that’s great’ isn’t the same as listening. Ditch your phone every now and then.
2. Eating shouldn’t be just another ‘to do’ on your list, but something you do as a family. A messy table and chit chat are a great combo for some quality family time.
3. Wine? Why not? A glass a day is also part of a daily routine. Grab some chips and dips and veggies – pour some water into a wine glass for your little ones – and you’ve got yourself a full-blown get together for the entire fam.
4. If you’re tired, just join in on the kids’ bed time routine, to hell with long overdue ironing.
5. It’s not the end of the world if you get mad every once in a while. Just make sure to make up and give a sincere apology in case you were being unreasonable. You wouldn’t expect any less if the shoe was on the other foot.
