Happy & Healthy

Why it’s okay to forget children’s birthdays

Confession time. I’m the worst at remembering birthdays. I have an aunt that sends me a card every time one of my girls has a birthday to celebrate and every Christian holiday (seriously, I’ll get a Christmas card three weeks in advance). I, on the other hand, am the complete opposite.

Here’s a shocking example. I texted my sister-in-law halfway through August last year and asked her what she had planned for her son’s birthday, which was on August 24th. Or so I thought. “Well, I haven’t thought of that yet.” A bit out of the ordinary for my usually extremely organized sister-in-law. “Sam’s birthday is on September 24th, not August!” The bad news was, I was off by a month.  The good news was, I was too early. And in my case, that really counts for something.

“Even my best friend Anna has had a couple of birthdays during which she would send me a text asking me if I didn’t forget something very important.”

The only birthdays I know by heart are those of my own family (even though I tend to mix up my daughters’ birth years. Was she born in 2009 or 2007? (Too much data in that pretty little head of mine.) And those of my parents. And then there’s a whole group of people that have their birthdays ‘somewhere’ in the same month. My friend Marte’s birthday is somewhere in the beginning of July, my other friend Asjha somewhere around December 12th. Or was it December 9th? Even my best friend Anna has had a couple of birthdays during which she would send me a text asking me if I didn’t forget something very important. Just to make sure I don’t do something awful.

And if that’s not hard enough, all of those friends, family members and acquaintances have children. Hoards of them. So now I officially suck at birthdays. And besides (and this is my second confession), I don’t mind sending them a birthday card, but if I’m being totally honest, I really wouldn’t mind missing out on their birthday party’s.

Before you know it, you’ll have two birthday parties every week. One from that uncle you never see and then another toddler’s birthday party. And they’re never really fun either. It’s basically artificial company, because even the birthday boy/girl doesn’t have the final say on the guest list. There’s always an aunt, uncle or annoying guest that nobody likes, but unfortunately they’re a part of the family. Or a friend’s father that just loves to share stories and memories of his family. I don’t care and I don’t want to hear it.

“I suck at it and I don’t have a birthday calendar.”

I think this is the reason why I don’t have a birthday calendar. So I can sort of legitimately forget them.

That was until I saw my friend M (the one who’s birthday is in early July) had said that her son was about to turn 1. I asked her when and I immediately felt ashamed for not knowing, because M is a really good friend and I should know the date of her son’s birth. At least for his first birthday.

“May-Britt, let’s just cut the crap. There are way too many kids to remember all their birthday’s. If I want you to know about it or if I want you at the party, I’ll send you an invite. Let’s not make a big deal out of it; it’s not worth the fuss.”

You see ladies, this is why she’s my friend.