May wonders
Is all this happening on the red carpet?
Tonight it’s going down at the Croisette in Cannes. The 68thst Film Festival opens its gates and lights its screens. I’ve been there a few times. That was really nice.
Sleeping in the Majestic (an incredibly five-star hotel where I stumbled over Jude Law, really) and then driving three meters in a limo to step out at the red carpet. No, I don’t have a well-kept secret past as a top actress that I never told you about; I was just there on invitation from advertisers.
Their guests are allowed on the red carpet and yes, even though you know you don’t belong there, you still feel like a princess. Especially that time I was walking there and I heard someone from the photographer's side call my name. That was Daphne Bunskoek who was filming with René Mioch. Instead of feeling like a nobody, I suddenly felt like a somebody.
Anyway, that red carpet. So I’ve had the chance to stroll on it three times, but there are still things I wonder about.
Is every woman who steps on it combat?
As in: is there anyone in the room who is actually wearing underwear? Under all those dresses with bites taken out of them, lace creations, and just incredibly sensitive fabrics, you might as well leave your underwear at home.
And if that’s the case, does everyone wear a little tampon?
Then you feel a bit more dressed as a star. Your OB serves as a sort of cork that keeps uncomfortable odors (yes sorry) and nervous little leaks at bay.
Can you overtake on the red carpet?
I always find it incredibly awkward when I walk on a red carpet and stand behind someone who is incredibly famous. That person is being shouted at by photographers, interviewed by a TV crew, and has to pose once with and then again without a partner. Do you then patiently wait until that session is over (with the risk of a blockage) or do you just go ‘oops sorry-end’ past them?
Can you greet each other?
It’s quite us-know-us there on the little red carpet. I already have it in the Netherlands where I wonder if I should greet Nicolette van Dam when I walk past her with an ‘oops, sorry-end’, but I always wonder if that’s appropriate. The nice thing about entertainment land is that the ‘me, myself, then a long pause and then the rest-code’ applies, so they probably haven’t even seen you. Although Nicolette is a bad example, because she is a sweetheart, but you get my point.
Are there correction moments?
The carpet in Cannes is really very long. With a triple hedge of shouting photographers along its total length. I always wonder if there’s some sort of pit stop area where a celeb can pull up their pants, relax their jaws, or fold the label of their dress inward. There probably isn’t, right? But admit it, it’s a good idea.
