Fun & Famous

4 funny penis facts and 1 trick

Men love to brag about their private parts. Well, we know a few more. Four funny penis facts and one clever trick.

Disguise

You may have never seen them live, but asparagus penises and cauliflower pickers are not uncommon. Genitals that imitate vegetables and vegetables that mimic the human phallus provide hours of entertainment. Take a look around the fruit bowl or online, like here. Or turn a recreational autumn walk in the woods into a damn entertaining hour of penis spotting by searching for the phallus impudicus, or the great stinkhorn, which pokes its penis-like cap and stem cheerfully through the rotting foliage on the ground.

Stop

Yes, we really understand that men get completely absorbed in the game of love and shoot their load way too early, but it's not fun. Nice that he has a stop button: press firmly and suddenly on the spot just behind his balls. That'll teach him to sprint to the finish line so quickly. Another method: grip his tip just below the edge with your thumb and index finger and wait half a minute. Cut-off method three: grip his balls at the attachment and pull slightly downwards. Balls creep up just before an orgasm, but by moving them in the opposite direction, that screaming climax will also be delayed.

Weapon

In the countryside of Bhutan, people paint penises on houses to ward off evil spirits. This practice is said to trace back to a Buddhist monk from the fifteenth century, also known as ‘the divine fool’, who used his phallus – affectionately called ‘lightning of flaming wisdom’ – to lead women to the right faith through sexual ecstasy. With his rod, he attempted to drive away female demons. Well, it is also quite a shock, such an upright dagger.

Hit number

Once upon a time, there was a king named Fatefehi. He ruled over Tonga, an archipelago near Polynesia. It is said that between 1770 and 1784, he deflowered about 37,800 women, which amounts to an average of seven virgins per day. They lived happily ever after.

Antidepressant

We actually don't know if we should make this public, because this knowledge can be a dangerous weapon in the hands of men. But well, we dare to say it: it seems that sperm contains substances that boost the mood, including oxytocin and serotonin, which make you feel more affection (cortisol) and help you sleep better, like melatonin. Basically, Prozac comes out of his flute. Make the most of it.