Beauty

7 THINGS ALMOST EVERYONE GETS WRONG

(how high do you score?)

Since I started working in ‘the industry’, I've received a lot of tutoring, resulting in me now walking around like a preachy fashion Jehovah, ready to give a corrective slap left and right. Because man oh man oh man, there is so much blundering done in the name of beauty.

Spraying versus spraying

No, no, no. You didn't just say you sprayed the perfume. Or as my mother says: “You spray whipped cream, you spray perfume.” My gay friend M has a slightly bolder variant on this and says: “You spray it on your pillow.” Anyway. In any case. You spray a perfume. Or apply it.

Dyeing versus coloring

You dye your wall, you color your hair. Period.

Scent versus air

In the bathroom, there is an air, you wear a scent. Or a perfume, but strictly speaking, a perfume is a concentrated version of eau de toilette. Scent can always be used, air never (by the way, these are scents that men find incredibly sexy).

Chain versus collar

A chain is on your bike. A collar hangs around your neck. If you find the term collar a bit too pretentious (I personally find the term collar sometimes a bit too grand for my modest jewelry), you can call it a pendant or neck jewelry. A long ‘chain’ (I’m going to write some punishment lines) is called a soutiens, but yes, if you say that, no one understands you. String is also an alternative. Neck string. Anything but chain.

“You spray whipped cream, you spray perfume.”

Clock versus watch

A clock hangs at the station. Or stands in the room. What you have on your wrist, we call a watch. Or a timepiece for my part. Anything. As long as it doesn't start with a k.

Suit or costume

My dear mother always talks about the suit. Even when it concerns the cool Paul Smith suit of my beloved. My grandfather wore a suit. Men nowadays do not anymore.

Shirt or shirt

Shirt. Period.

You're back with me. What a whiner I am, right? But believe me, it will save you in situations with at least as nitpicky types as I am.