Jets Places

QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD NOT ASK YOUR GIRLFRIEND

When she is getting married.

I really want to get married, but I find someone else's wedding even more fun. I always have a pack of tissues on hand because I shed a tear when I see a proud grandmother of the bride or groom sitting there or when I see a nervous groom walking around. Just imagine what happens when the bride walks down the aisle. All out of joy, you understand.

During the preparations for a wedding, I am more than happy to help: let me help with decorating, making name cards, coming up with sketches, taking polaroid photos, throwing flower petals, and turning the music on and off. In my group of friends, we are in the cohabitation phase and we have already talked a bit about babies and such, but getting married is not really being planned yet. They are all waiting for me. Apparently. The boy is a bit older and was born in the ‘Eusten’ of the country, where settling down happens a bit faster, so we will be getting in the car a few times this summer to celebrate love. And: I will of course help wherever I can.

I prefer to stay in touch with the bride because then I can enjoyably ooh and ahh and sigh and shout ‘Ooooh, I am so looking forward to it!’ because I just think it is the best party that exists. There are also questions that you better not ask the bride because they will only make her grumpy or even more nervous. Luckily, I have never voiced them, but here is a nice reminder for me as well.

‘Are you going to exercise and diet a lot for the dress?’

Here you can really hit a painful nerve because maybe your girlfriend is not planning that at all and suddenly becomes super insecure about it. Just DO NOT talk about it. And by the way, your girlfriend is beautiful just the way she is. Look, if she brings it up herself, then of course you can talk about it. And maybe say: “Hello, you don't need that at all, do you?”

‘Do I really have to give a speech? Would you be very upset if I don't?’

If she has asked you to do this, then it is not appropriate to refuse this task. And if she hasn't asked you but you are one of her dearest friends (she is kind of expecting it), then this statement is also a no-go. Just get over it and go. Use a PowerPoint with lots of pictures, make an ABC, and everyone will be satisfied quickly.

‘And what if it rains?’

Okay, okay, you can touch on this topic cautiously, but do it subtly. For example, say: “Shall we come up with a plan B for bad weather?” Or: “Shall I take care of plan B?” A bit nicer, otherwise there will be total panic right away.

‘What is your budget, by the way?’

Well, I find this a difficult one. It's the same as: “How much do you earn?”. Real best friends can of course share a wedding budget with each other, but I find it a bit of an awkward question. You have nothing to do with this, and even if you knew, you couldn't do anything with it.

‘How are you going to pay for that?’

HAHA.