Fun & Famous
‘YES, BUT WHERE IS HE THEN?‘
This question definitely rolls off my tongue at least once a day at the office. And if it doesn't come out of my mouth, I ask it to myself in my head. And writing it down like this makes me sound quite desperate. Stop it, Simone, stop it. You're healthy, have a nice life, live in Amsterdam, have the best job you could wish for, lovely people around you, oh, and by the way, tomorrow also an interview with Doutzen Kroes in Antwerp. I mean, it doesn't sound like a terribly boring life...
Yet we all know that we are not made to stay alone and it is therefore normal that this question drives me crazy. Wherever I go, the little devil speaks.
1. In the Albert Heijn
He has a basket, I have a basket. But look, this is where it goes wrong. You won't find those single-serving kale containers in my basket. In fact, I fill my basket with Olvarit Breakfast cereals for children from 12 months. No, I don't have a child, okay? I just like eating baby food for breakfast, alright? But that probably doesn't matter to Prince Charming if he peeks into my basket.
2. Under the Eiffel Tower in Paris
So I was there on Monday. And secretly, when you walk through Paris, you look around to see if that handsome Frenchman is wandering around somewhere. Or maybe waiting for you under that tower. Or am I sounding too romantic now?
3. In the morning at the gym
They walk around at 7 o'clock, really. But you know, I really don't look my best at that time. My alarm goes off at 6:40 AM and by 6:50 AM I'm on my bike with brushed teeth and combed hair. No concealer or a swipe of mascara involved. The advantage if I do run into him there one day is that he will have seen me at my cleanest. Nothing to hide, baby.
4. At that one press party
The waiter with the tray of champagne? The handsome chef in the kitchen? At nine out of ten parties I end up at, about 80 percent are women. The chance of meeting Mr. Right there is about as big as the chance of finding a five-hundred-euro note in the gutter tomorrow.
‘He’s wandering around, darling, when you least expect it.’
5. On the train
You won't find him either, you know. On Friday evening at 6:30 PM you can choose between the student who is going to do his laundry at mom's for the weekend or the mushy couple that does have a romantic prospect.
6. At the gate
Yes, I have a weakness for the ‘traveler’. Been there done that, I know. And I am healed too. But still, airports have something magical for me. And somehow I feel attracted to handsome men who speak everything but Dutch. But I can't allow that anymore. No more hello/goodbye nonsense. Just a down-to-earth Dutchman.
7. At the birthday party
Nephew, great-nephew, or best friend of? Unfortunately, I am usually the only single in the company. Just when something nice comes in, a beautiful blonde girl hops in right behind. Yes, go ahead, pour more.
8. At your work
Jet is the proof. It can happen.
9. In the cockpit
Once you're on the plane, sneak into the bathroom next to the cockpit. Check 1: is he handsome? Check 2: is he wearing a ring? Usually, I don't get past the first check. And yes, whether that second check is reliable...
10. Or just on the driveway
In America, at your aunt's...
I don't know, you know. Anyone have the golden tip?
‘He’s wandering around, darling, when you least expect it.’ ‘Yes mom, I know...
