These are the ultimate sex toys for women
The Tarzan 3000. We know that name by now. Or what about the dolphin? The pink rabbit from Sex and the City? Boooooring. You see, we also want something different. Something funny. That's why I dove into the depths of the sex web to see what's funny in vibraland. Here they come:
1. The exciting eggplant
You want it because: the toy is inspired by the emoji of the eggplant. Which NOBODY uses on their phone to depict dishes, because the eggplant is of course just a penis. We all know that. Brilliant, this thing. How do you mean, stealing the show during all the upcoming bachelorette parties? Oh and, if you go on a trip, you just take your friend with you in his own travel box with the text: ‘Go f*ck yourself’. Literally. BRILLIANT.
How much does it cost? 28 euros.
2. The ‘Hot Pepper the OMG-spot’
You want it because: oh yes baby, the hotness is here! Seriously, why do normal sex toys even still exist when emojis are so much cooler? Does the avocado already exist? Hmm, maybe too round. The croissant? Mwah, too curved. The unicorn then? Or is that just too painful with that point? Ah, you know what, for now there is the hot pepper and that's cool enough. For the spice that feels nice, you know.
How much does it cost? 28 euros.
3. The ‘glowing dildo’
You want it because: this vibrating vibe can save you from the most shitty situations. It could happen to you: you're just having a nice time, THE POWER GOES OUT and you're in pitch darkness. And then this glowing friend comes to your rescue! Quite handy.
How much does it cost? 44.95 euros.
4. The ‘Clone a Willy’
You want it because this is brilliant. Just the name alone. For when your boy is at the annual football outing with his friends. For when you've just been dumped while your ex had the most beautiful lance on earth that you don't want to miss (and so you've quickly copied it, you sneaky girl). And maybe because this dick never walks away. Okay, joke, joke.
How much does it cost? 44.95 euros.
5. The ‘I rub my duckie’
You want it because it's a rubber duck. A pink rubber duck, HELLO. And also a rather chic duck with a feather boa (removable with Velcro) and a real Swarovski crystal on its beak.
How much does it cost? 22.99 euros.
6. The ‘I use this for my ‘lips’
You want it because: let's call it discreet design. With this mini lipstick vibrator, no one needs to know that you have grand plans with yourself. The lipstick promises to vibrate quietly and due to its lipstick shape, you can très easily stimulate the right spots. Put it in your makeup bag and you're ready.
How much does it cost? 15.95 euros.
Have a nice weekend, huh...
