4 tips for young mothers to have and maintain a social life

It's three o'clock in the afternoon and there's still a busy afternoon ahead. Jon is abroad and my mother is on vacation, so there's nothing else to do but take the little man along for the ride. And the day starts off well: Mr. has apparently slept poorly this afternoon and refuses to eat my oh-so-delicious homemade vegetable puree. So quickly a brown sandwich with nut butter, so I don't arrive too late for my appointment. Luckily, he finds the baby carrier a blast, and together we cheerfully head out the door. Upon arriving at the cargo bike (I know, I've become one of those ‘cargo bike mothers‘... But believe me: it's really not doable in Amsterdam without one) I see that the battery is almost empty. It will be exciting to see if we can make it back, but we'll park that stress for later.

Once I arrive at my appointment, Otis steals the show and hardly anything comes of the work meeting. And then I suddenly smell a remarkably sour odor that I can recognize out of thousands... Great, diaper number three of the day has now spread over his outfit, my outfit, and the ridiculously expensive baby carrier. Well, it's a good reason to wrap up the conversation; for everyone's sense of smell, it's better if I head home. But then a friend calls who happens to be around the corner, asking if I want ice cream. Oh, fuck it, Otis doesn't seem to mind that diaper, so those ten minutes later at home can still work.

And although this may sound like a hellish day, I often get more energy from it than if I had stayed indoors all day. Because with such a little one, there's a great chance that your social life will be on an extremely low flame. For me, it's important to get out and break that ‘baby bubble’ every now and then. Here are a few tips that have given me that extra push to get back out there. You just take all those awkward moments in stride.

• Buy a good baby carrier: especially if you live on the third floor in the city, you don't want to be dragging that stroller around all the time. That has already held me back a few times from going out. With a good baby carrier, you're super flexible and can step outside or hop on the tram easily.
• Don't panic too quickly: sitting on a crowded terrace with a screaming little one, a giant poopy diaper while you've just happened to forget the diaper bag, or getting completely spit up on when you've finally put on a nice dress and spend the rest of the day walking around the city under sour stains: been there, done that. By now, I take a few deep breaths and sing Elsa's hit ‘Let it go’ in my head. It prevents a lot of headaches and stress moments.
• Have an army of babysitters in your phone, so you can always call someone if you want to work out for an hour or go for a drink in the evening. And to save money (because you really go through it with such a little one): ask your friends who would love to hang out on your couch for a few hours in exchange for a delicious meal.
• If you'd rather not go out: invite your social appointment over for a cozy lunch at your place. This way, you have all the time for that friend you haven't spoken to in months, and the little one is happily napping in his own bed.