7x you expect this anyway when you go on your honeymoon

Can I write this down properly? Yes, right? Oh, we are almost married anyway. The chance that he suddenly drops out and runs to the notary because of this post seems non-existent to me.

Because what do you actually expect as newlyweds when you go on honeymoon? Good, of course, white beaches, palm trees, nice weather, finally being able to wear your finest beach dresses and a good glass of vino from time to time. And being together, that too, yes. You might almost forget it. But still, especially something else. Something, uh, that mainly takes place in the bedroom.

Here they come, because this is what newlyweds expect romantics when they go on their honeymoon:

• Sex. Alright, I’ll just write it down. I don’t care. Isn’t it so? I’m not going to be newly married and hold hands, cuddle, and nap for three weeks. No way. One way or another: we’re going through that hotel room. Every hotel room we encounter. A jet lag? I don’t care. That brings me to the next point.
• Kissing. So I want to kiss on the beach again, just like back then, old-fashioned kissing. Just because that post-wedding phase makes you feel very much in love again. And then you lie in the sun with a coconut in your hands to drink from and you look deeply into each other’s eyes. And then you give each other a kiss throughout the day. ‘I’m going to pee, smack’. ‘I’m going to get an ice cream, smack’. ‘I’m going to read my book, smack’. That’s allowed. This vacation, after that it’s over with the sweet fun.
• I want to experience that pink cloud. That you are just so intensely happy just being together. Don’t you want that, those days?
• Okay, I also expect to relax nicely. To recover. Because goodness gracious, what a busy time it is before the wedding. But as mentioned: only after that romp.
• Making children. Alright, if my mother reads this now, she’ll be completely shocked. But yes, I’m not saying this necessarily applies to us. But there is simply time for that on such a trip together. And that’s what it’s all about, because after that wedding it’s inevitable within a reasonable time, time for big step number two. How romantic is it if your baby is conceived on this trip? Then do put those desired glasses of vino aside, of course. Don’t forget.
• I want to do and see some cool things. Let’s go paragliding. Just because we’ve never done it before. And because something like that always stays with you. And let’s swim with dolphins. Also cool for the photos. By the way, that’s going to be a thing, because my husband hates taking photos and I love being in photos. I foresee some bickering.
• I want a lot of good conversations. Finally having a moment together not to talk about that wedding. Finally. Planning for a year is long, you know. Can we now go back to chatting about our ordinary, weekday, boring, simple life? Please.

Alright, we’re heading off to sunny California in a few days, where we hopefully will mainly admire those bedrooms at Malibu Beach. One way or another. Bye.