About yesterday

I was social media-shy because a. it was almost Christmas, b. my children had taken over my phone and c. I was also celebrating my birthday and was on a little boat with loved ones. But I was still nudged a bit.

A piece I had written on Friday was taken the wrong way. Not a little, but a lot. In all her kindness, my boss decided to take the piece offline. It hurt her too much how I was being torn apart on the digital marketplace called Facebook and pelted with rotten tomatoes.

And that’s a bit silly. Because those who are being sheared must sit still, and moreover, now all the commotion remained readable and no one could read how bad my piece was or wasn’t. Or that what I meant well was interpreted differently. Due to all the hate reactions, we all got ‘fresh’ visitors who don’t know our language and miss the wink. You might think that I wrote that I secretly take pleasure in throwing labrador puppies into frying oil (in case you want to grab those rotten tomatoes now, this is a joke), but I wrote about what I always wonder when I visit our favorite nail salon run by Vietnamese people on Amstelveenseweg. Not meant unkindly at all, but apparently taken that way.

I was even called a racist, which is remarkable because I was exactly at that moment on a boat with my best friend who is Chinese herself, so the racism isn’t that bad. Another Chinese acquaintance texted me and I asked her what she had found offensive. I reread my piece and still see my wink and my good intentions, but I also understood that some words can come across as hurtful. It’s my tone, I try to be funny, but I understand, especially if you don’t know me and my writing style, that you can read it differently. That wasn’t intended but it did happen and I regret that. A person is never too old to learn, as it turns out on your 46th birthday.

Still, I want to say one more thing and address Madeleijn van den Nieuwenhuizen who addresses the world as @zeikschrift. You say you tackle racism, but if you really want to do that, you should engage in conversation. With me. Ask me what my motivation was and then I would have explained to you that my intention was a piece meant to be funny where I also wanted to point out that we are doing very well and that I have respect for how these families manage together. But what @zeikschrift does is sow hate and post hateful reactions to my colleagues who have nothing to do with this piece. And that doesn’t seem to be the intention if you want to make the world a better place.

My apologies to everyone I have unintentionally hurt. And a Merry Christmas to all.