If you are the first of your friends to start having children

If you had asked me five years ago who among my best friends would have a baby first, I would have put myself last.

Don't be silly. Some have had a stable and serious relationship for much longer. Not too long ago, I was still happily fluttering around in the single life of Amsterdam. No joke. My friends have been together with their loves for years and are no longer single. They've been living together for a long time. They have a steady and fixed life. And just look at what time can do. About sixteen months ago, I was just Tess who was back with her ex. Now: Tess who is married and pregnant and having two children. No one saw that coming, I'm sure. I'm also sure that I was also last on their list, about five years ago.

Although I can still remember well that one of my besties said half a century ago during a weekend away in Antwerp: ‘I secretly think you'll end up with Billy.’ I was single back then, you can imagine how well she knows me. Better than I knew myself then, because I was still saying something like: ‘No way, that will never work out again!’ Ha. We had quite a flickering light relationship, the two of us, Billy and I. But hey, everything happens for a reason and now we are actually happier than ever. Maybe because we've also had some wilder years without each other.

Anyway, that was then. Time is something special, because time teaches you that you actually know very little about life. You can't predict real things, can't know, can't estimate. Life happens to you. It's a miracle that I've become pregnant so quickly, but at the same time, it is and remains exciting. Am I really ready for this, being the first of everyone around me? That's something I often wonder. Are you ever really ready for it? When do you know that? I have about fifteen weeks to go, then I'll be a mom. Incredible.

Who knows, it might have helped me if I could first take a look at a good friend, how she does it all, this whole motherhood thing. But that's not possible. Moreover, I don't think the chance is very high that a good friend of mine will also have twins, so oh well, that's all different anyway. But somewhere it's also very nice to be the first of all. Because: they now have time for babies, are excited about babies, and find it all new and fun and wonderful. They don't have two kids to take care of themselves and want to hear everything about the pregnancy, because that's also uncharted territory. They are so enthusiastic, so sweet, so happy with the good news, that helps a lot in these exciting times. Because it's really something, having two boys in a few weeks.

Fortunately, I have quite a few wonderful women by my side, who may not know much about baby boys, but hey, at least we can laugh while changing all 87 diapers and pee that flies in all directions. That's what boys do, I've heard.