12x what you thought when you watched Ajax

Yes, you thought I was joking when I said my beloved was specifically going to buy a TV to watch the semi-final. But we were sitting last night armed with wine and an Ajax scarf in front of a device that still had the plastic on it. As I said, I am an absolute fair-weather supporter and only spring into action when a semi-final is in sight. Initially, I had some shouting shyness, but I must say that this quickly disappeared. Anyway, the evening in 12 thoughts.

1. Am I seeing this correctly?

Did Toby Alderweireld seriously get the emblem of Amsterdam (the three XXX that stand for Heroic, Resolute, and Merciful) tattooed on his right upper arm? How cute. The Tottenham coach might not be too happy about that now.

2. I need to keep my mouth shut

I don't want to engage in internalized sexism as it's so nicely called these days and I certainly don't want to say that women know nothing about football, but I don't belong to that group that knows everything about offside. So no matter how much I feel the need to say that Lasse Schöne seems less sharp as the match progresses; I just need to cheer, shudder, and refill glasses. Nothing is more annoying than a bystander who suddenly thinks they can join the conversation.

3. I need to keep my mouth shut anyway

And we all do. Man, everyone knows it so well and everyone criticizes those guys. People, these are exceptional talents who train every day their whole lives, who haven’t gone out during their puberty, and who have really endured a trial to reach this level. Here we are with our juicy bellies and full glasses thinking we know better. We should be ashamed.

4. Helène Hendriks

What an asset I think that is. Yesterday her stylist had very much the 80s in mind (think fuchsia double-breasted blazer, firm triangular earrings with rhinestones, and blue eyeshadow), but she can pull it all off. She is funny, smart, modest, pretty, and skilled, and she manages (can we create an Oscar for this) to make Johan Derksen smile. Five hearts for Helène.

5. How long can it take before there is peace?

At the end of the first half, we lost (yes, ‘we’, yes) a bit of control and sat there with clenched buttocks on the bench. We needed a break, to ground ourselves, to listen to Ten Hag's soft accent for a moment. But man, that clock just kept ticking.

6. That poor, poor Vertonghen

Even though he belongs to Tottenham, he was of course ours for a long time (yes, ours, yes) and he is just a nice guy who has probably dreamed for twenty years of playing in a Champions League semi-final. And then you want to head the ball and suddenly Alderweireld is there and then there is blood. My youngest daughter ran crying to her room, she found it so sad. And then you want to continue playing. That moment when you think: it’s probably better not to.

7. I suddenly think a lot about Nouri

What would he have thought of this.

8. I suddenly think a lot about Nouri's parents

Could they even watch this? My heart shrinks.

9. What does watching a match do to a person?

Some time ago, it was examined what happens in my brain when I eat chocolate. I would love to put that swim cap with electrodes on my beloved during a match, because what he goes through during such a match. Not to mention his heart.

10. They have such nice shoes on

A uniform is one thing, but a little flash with your hairstyle and your shoes even more. That is of course allowed. And with your tattoos. Creativity thrives best in a slightly too tight bag, the singer of the Tröckener Kecks once said so aptly, and you can see that in the appearances of all the players.

11. When is it over?

I want to breathe again.

12. And now a little rest until May 8

Man, my heart, my heart.