Kiki's Expedition Robinson babbles

Gooooood morning Expedition Ettertje, how's life? Had a nice weekend? Struggling to keep your eyes open on this damn Monday? On your way to work? Just a little more to endure (no seriously, without the #spon Fisherman's Friends) and then it's Tuesday again. But first, you and I need to chat a bit. Sjongejongejonge. Man man man. What a bunch of losers over there on Devil's Island. And more things we all thought on the couch. Time for episode two, howzeeee!

1. Isn't it funny that Rob Kneus -sorry Geus- is more worried about the wok being level and the ‘consistency of his porridge’ (UHGL) than actually preparing food. ‘The first one always fails, right?’ What the hell is happening on that first morning of Devil's Island?!

2. Wait a minute. So he uses up all the flour first. Then he throws food away. Then everything catches fire, and if there's still a part that hasn't caught fire, he throws it in the sand...

OMG.

REALIZE.

ROB....

IS. THE. F***ING. MOLE.

3. Hey, if I ever have to survive on an island, can I please wash up with Hugo? Banana pancakes with coconut flakes and a flower on the side?! Dream man.

4. Maybe I dreamed last night about a toast with the Shiradja sauce from Conimex. And that Mr. Go Tan was running after me very angrily, throwing noodles at my head and shouting ’TRAITOR!!‘. Then you know that shit is about to go down.

5. I'm already praising Hugo. And his conversation with the snail is hilarious: ‘It's eat or be eaten. It's the jaaangle. Come on bitch.’

6. Hugo: ‘Oh dear if you see a monkey. Or a chicken or whatever. And you don't call me.’

TV chef Hugo Kennis (†) 1986-2019.
Deceased in game show after eating a monkey.

7. So sad that Devil's Island is so broke that they even cut the presenter from their trials and have to do it with a letter and count down themselves HAHAHA.

8. Wonderful that the creators still let Kaj be a bit Kaj: ‘It's unbelievably hot this year. We've already seen Berdien collapse, and now Hugo

has overheated.’

9. ‘It's like 50 degrees heeeere and I'm not exercising, so I see that going down. Oooo no I'm really not going to eat that.’ I'm already looking forward to the eating trial with Roy.

10. Best tweet of the week: ‘The explanation of the trials always reminds me of those story problems from back in the day: the train goes 4km per hour south, in the train a man eats three apples per minute. How many people are on the bike?’

11. Meanwhile, Eva is getting a headache from Rob: ‘Well, I really don't like confronting people but dude, this is my e-tuuh.’ Eev, I feel you girl. #DontTouchMyFood.

12. A meters-long tree of a guy with braids and a Paddington bear hat. We all agree: Frenkie Langkous looks like a thirteen-year-old girl on the island council. Never seen something so unsexy in my life. Sorry buddy.

13. If you're wondering where all the Youtubers are in the picture, I have a theory about that too: Dionne and Kalvijn stay in a bit longer. Their airtime is being gradually increased.

Ah gus Anita... The young ones against the old ones has become just like the Belgians against the Dutch used to be. Personally, I would have kicked Jaapie home earlier (‘Do I have to get that clumsy body of 102 kilos up that tube? I can't even handle it’), but well, it's easy to talk from behind the TV of course. It was again enjoyable people. Looking forward to next week.

P.S. Follow me on insta at @kikiduren for more Robinson nonsense and misery. Oh and, if you feel like causing a ruckus this afternoon, tune in to RTL 4 at 5 PM. Maybe I'll be handing out awards to Robinson candidates in an improvised bamboo shop. Excited annnn.

P.P.P.S. Heart at the bottom if you're nice. Just because it can, this Monday. And you know it.