Of the words we mispronounce

“But when do you use ‘if’ and when do you use ‘then’?” I used to get that question a lot. I had no idea back then, I just knew it. Somewhere inside me is a radar that starts flipping when those two words are used incorrectly. Just like with ‘their’, ‘advocado’ or ‘me’ when it should be far from me. People like me also often get insulted yes, risk of the job. But there are those words that are almost always mispronounced by someone. We present them to you.

Avocado
I rest my case. Ad has nothing to do with the vocado.

Entrecôte
Emphasizing ‘côte’. It’s entrocooooot.

Yeezy
Irritation point of our Daan. Kanye's brand has nothing to do with Djiezie, it’s Yeezy (pronounced as jiezie).

Latte
Honestly, how often have you heard someone order a laaateeee makkieato at Starbucks? Just stick with latte and then you add a makjato to that.

Expresso
I think people do this on purpose. Espressootje, anyone?

Omelet
Not to be confused with an oooomelet, no no. The correct articulation is om-melet. I had made a double m’etje for convenience, but who am I?

Texaco
The gas station that everyone mislabels. Until you hear the ad ‘Let’s go Texaco’ and then you suddenly realize you’ve been doing something weird with that emphasis your whole life.

Nike
Pronounce it as Nai-kie.

Levi’s
Doing it nice and international, say ‘Lieveis’ and you get bonus points.

Quinoa
Never ask for the kie-no-a, but very food responsibly ask if you get kienwa with it.

Action
We opt that from now on everyone just calls Action the A-c-tion, because we find that much more original and a bit chic.

Oberrr
Once and for all: tonight you order: tequilllla, not tequilja. I understand you’re going to say ‘yes’ to the stuff, but a regular short ‘la’ suffices at the end. Tequilalalalalalala.