Or can we leave Eva Jinek's breasts alone for a moment

‘Eva, calm your tits please’, it was written seriously. On Twitter, Eva's breasts were apparently a popular topic last night. I have so many thoughts about this that I actually don't know where to start and I begin to sputter a bit. Until I thought of exactly the right place: at Eva's décolletage.

We can regularly catch Eva in a jacket with a top underneath, to put it disrespectfully, her uniform. Only this uniform stirs things up among the dear viewers. Because: they get distracted from the more serious matters of life by Eva's breasts. I was quite into the last season of Homeland yesterday, so to check how distracting Eva's friends were, I watched the broadcast back for us.

Peter R. de Vries joined to explain a murder, Minister Van Nieuwenhuizen talked about the devastating drought in the Achterhoek (?) and Man Bijt Hond is back (how nice). I was listening with my mouth open to journalist Huib Modderpoel who explained what peaks can be read in the consumption of my iPhone, really: we can never use that excuse of a dead battery again. At least not if you are a suspect in an investigation. I even had to remind myself after five minutes that I really had to pay attention to Eva's breasts in the next shot, because I actually forgot them and that was what the fuss was ultimately about. Her breasts were just not trending on Twitter yet, so it must have been visible up to the navel. If she had even worn anything at all.

And then I saw it, her. And do you know what I saw? A woman with breasts, boys and girls. A woman with a décolletage, ladies and gentlemen. My god, what a prudishness, what a frigid fuss, what an interference. A. Woman. Has. Breasts. Eva Jinek has breasts. Welcome to 2019. And if you can't handle it? Then come back again when you've reread the chapter on human anatomy. Goodness gracious, she has breasts.

Eva, please don't calm your tits. Amen.