Where you don't understand anything if you don't have children

Just before she plopped down in her chair, she swung a Chanel bag right in front of my nose. I let out a cry, grabbed the bag, and asked how she got that. “Oh, that's my birthing gold,” was the answer. And since then, I can only think: what?

If you haven't brought a child into the world, then apparently a part of your vocabulary remains particularly unused and untouched. Or actually, a very large part of knowledge, you could say. The term birthing gold was completely foreign to me, and I'm not the only one, because my autocorrect keeps underlining the word while I type this. But then I suddenly heard about sleep training. Apparently, you can teach babies to sleep under the guidance of a sleep coach (what a job, what a job). I thought this was one of the basic principles in life that we didn't need to practice, but apparently, I was wrong. Sleep training for babies is perfectly normal, I see from the people around me who do have children.

Back to the birthing gold, because I feel like so much is wrong with the word, the idea, and the meaning of this issue. Yes, it already feels like an issue to me. First of all, you apparently should get gold for giving birth to a child? Don't get me wrong, I think you should pamper yourself and your partner where possible, but a reward for giving birth? It feels a bit like: yes, well done, and now keep quiet about those stitches. Still, am I feeling emotions that don't come into play at such a moment? That could be, because I haven't given birth in life yet.

If you type the term ‘birthing gold’ into Google, it throws all kinds of jewelry at you. I even read that it is also called ‘throwing gold’. Throwing gold, people, what is this banal thing? Well, it turns out to be a tradition in affluent families as I read more about the phenomenon, and especially a tradition among our English neighbors who are skilled at giving expensive gifts. The mother has toiled for nine months, and she should be rewarded for that. Not just by the partner, by the way, but also by (in-laws) who reward you for the descendants of the family.

I also always bring something nice for a friend who has just had a baby, I realize now. A nice cream, a nice bottle that pops (after all, you can have alcohol again) or just something she enjoys, just for her. So apparently, I find the idea sweet, because I don't limit myself to gifts for the little sprout. Maybe it's the term that throws me off a bit, or could it be the idea? I’ll think about it a bit more.