This is how I have changed since I became a mother

The beautiful and the crazy thing about motherhood is that I can hardly imagine what life is like without children. And that while I was not a mother for over 29 years. But since I became one, everything is different. I can't explain to friends without babies what is different. It is… Everything.

To start with your days and nights, your rhythm, your free time. All revolving around those two boys of mine, who are now eight months old. They determine when it is quiet in the house, when they sleep, when we play, when we eat while they sit in their Tripp Trapp chairs from Stokke. That takes some getting used to, because in the past you had a day for yourself, or well, I had ALL days for myself. But I didn't realize that back then. I don't think there is a greater impact on your life and especially on your time for yourself. And having twins must be different from motherhood with one child. One of the two always wants attention.

But then also my feelings, how I stand in life, how I see myself: all different since March 7, 2019. Everything has completely turned 360 degrees for me since I became the mom of Bodi and Daaf. Suddenly I only want to be with them and work, friends, wine in the pub, likes on Instagram, and parties here and there matter much less. My world is getting smaller, I like being at home. I enjoy mothering. That is now the only thing that matters. You feel a responsibility for your little ones that you never knew before. You feel emotions that you never had. I am so tired from nights that you can't even call nights, with at most four hours of sleep for us as father and mother, but then I see my son's smile in the morning when he is sitting in his Tripp Trapp chair... And then everything in the world is good again. Nothing smells better than my child. Nothing kisses better than the chubby cheeks of my little boys.

This is how I have changed in 8 points since I became a mother:

1. I am softer. Much softer than before. I cry when I see an ad where a mother is arguing with her child, just to name something. I can't handle anything anymore. I cry at everything that has even a hint to do with children. My husband does too, by the way.

2. I am happier. I told a friend the other day. Now that I am a mother, I am much happier with my life than before, when I was still swirling around Amsterdam. Back then there was always unrest, I had to be everywhere. I was always busy with this and that and cycling from east to south. And now? There is focus, there is attention for what is most important to me. My little ones.

3. I am tired. Sorry. But really. Very, very tired. Anyone want a coffee?

4. I am happier with my husband. I think we make a good team together and we need that with these two boys. But we are also more in love because of that, closer to each other than ever. Those babies... Those cutest little ones... We just made them. How is that possible?

5. I am closer to my parents and in-laws. We see each other much more often since the grandchildren are here and that is nice. We also see each other more often because of all the babysitting moments and that does me good.

6. I can say ‘no’ more easily. What I said: the only thing that matters are my children, ultimately, with whatever I do. Not that extra day of work on the weekend, not going to that drink with that vague acquaintance that I have no energy for. You become more selective about where you spend your energy and that is sometimes good.

7. I feel privileged, more often than when I was not a mother. I am glad that I am fit again after giving birth, enjoying every walk because my body can handle it again. I am proud of my body, which has carried two children for eight months. I know that having children is not a given, and I realize that with every night bottle again. Then I think: I get to do this. Be happy with that. And I am. Especially if I ever get to sleep six hours in a row again. Let's arrange that for tonight, guys? You’ll get an extra kiss on your chubby cheeks.

8. I feel more useful. Or yes, how do you say that? I now have a kind of new, big life goal, every day again. And that is: to take care of my children and raise them in a nice way and let them grow up with joy. That feels good, every day I get to fill that role. Being a mother. The busiest and most beautiful job you can get. What really helps me to manage the household well now is that Stokke Tripp Trapp chair. Especially with two boys during mealtime who are just getting bigger and bigger. Believe me, this will be your first purchase when you are pregnant.

And also Life by Mary can't do without the Tripp Trapp chairs from Stokke anymore. Just look.

In collaboration with Stokke