Kiki's Bachelorette Chatter: 10 things I thought during episodes 1 and 2

Call me an obsessive weirdo, but the first thing I thought about this morning was… GABY! Yes, the girl’s search for love is on Videoland and of course I had to binge the first two episodes right away. And I must say: so far I haven't been bored for a second. Awkwardness, insecurity, rooster behavior: The Bachelorette is everything you want to see and more.

You understand that this needs to be discussed. 10 points we still need to talk about.

1. Ho-Ly-Shit. Can we first talk about that South African fairy tale house? Damn. With an indoor pool + balcony view to die for. Seriously, if I had known this, I would have signed up to win her heart too.

2. ‘Gaby's pitfall is that she is too sweet. She invests too much of herself in another. While she doesn't get much back for it and that's not good.’ Gaby has the sweetest parents ever.

3. I must also say that the creators do a good job of giving us viewers a different image of Gaby right away. The vulnerable side. Clearly emotional: ‘I want someone with whom I can share everything. Because I do so many beautiful things in my life. Sometimes that can be quite lonely.’ Aah. I wish Gaby true love.

4. Then on to the introduction round of the eighteen men. What must that walk from the car to Gaby have been a true torture for some. One is just spouting nonsense, the other completely misses the mark with ten – way too big, way too wrapped – gifts. Again someone forgets to even give their gift.  

Everyone has the urge to tell each other (and Gaby) every second how nervous they are out of awkwardness. This is entertainment at its finest.

5. Let’s do the top 3 of awkward moments then. Just because it’s fun.

Kasper from Eeenschedeeeee who holds Gaby’s hands for ten minutes.

The most awkward pickup line: ‘I see you looking. What kind of crazy peanut is this? Hi. I’m Chester.’

Chris with the box of Pandora from Venlo. ‘Go ahead, open it. Or are you not curious?’ The moment he started calling himself ‘Chris with the beautiful roses’, followed by: ‘Good of me, right?’ it was over. You could see it on her face. After that, it even seemed like he would have preferred to keep his gift for himself. Meeeeen, what an awkward man.

6. Also a special moment for Niek, the 31-year-old car dealer. Does he get ‘a tanning session’ every week? Every week to the hairdresser? The eyebrows get systematically done every three weeks? Meine gute, what a fuss.

7. Then let’s talk about the guys who score points in terms of first impression.

The 27-year-old Jordy (owner of that jeans brand) with his puppy cheeks and playful eyes. Omg. This dude is so handsome.

The 31-year-old teacher Andreas. Good entrance. Motor. I like. Living with two cats sounds a bit sad though.

That guy with the socks with ice creams. Just because ice cream socks are fun.

And then the next man, who is responsible for the best quote so far…

8. ‘Not because it’s Moët, but because it can.’ HAHAHA Ritchie, I love you. Whether she finds you sexy or not, please stay in this show for a long time!

9. Meanwhile, the 41-year-old, cocktail-shaking brother of Brainpower is also participating. The man with life experience (you can taste it immediately) and the beautiful voice.

10. Oh and Gaby, I don’t quite understand your fascination with that quiet/arrogant guy. But well, seems quite complicated to me too, 18 dogs fighting over one leg. But there are some cuties among them. Go for it, girl. In a sequined/feather dress. Not because it’s Moët, but because it can.

P.S.: Good overall judgment on The Bachelorette then… Can we already speak of a new guilty pleasure? Yes, right? 

P.P.S.: Next week = crying during the date? Bungee jumping? Love it already.