The new fomo in quarantine is ifomo
The paragraph I just wrote here I just deleted. I was proclaiming that I had no more trouble with fomo at all, because no one these days does anything sensible anyway, but suddenly it turned out I did have fomo after all. A whole different kind of fomo, that it is. Actually, it has become ifomo, not to be confused with a new device from Apple by the way, because it simply means isolation-fomo. What am I talking about? Well...
That people are drinking without you
I found out that my friend enjoys a nice beer with colleagues after work in the afternoon, and suddenly I wanted to have a beer with colleagues too. I actually didn't care which colleagues.
Not being invited to video calls
That you know people are video calling without you, this is actually the equivalent of not being invited to a party. By the way, you can just crash on Houseparty, as long as they haven't locked the conversation.
Not living in the postal code area of your favorite delivery restaurant
RIJKS, I'm still talking about you. Wieke asked me this week if I could actually order a bit here. Yes, the Amsterdammer is worried about people outside the Ring. Now I can't really complain, but a time at Neni or RIJKS wouldn't be wrong. I'm just being honest.
Receiving fewer packages than someone else in your household
The doorbell rings here all day long, but three-quarters of the packages are not for me and that does things to a person in quarantine. By the way, do you also have that, that you suddenly talk about people in your household and having a runny nose? I've tapped into a completely new part of my vocabulary due to the corona crisis.
Only doing groceries once a week while your sister/brother does it at least twice
Never thought I would ever be jealous of something like grocery shopping, but it has become a bit of the outing of the week. Just like the car wash by the way. And I heard someone say they had been to Hema. I haven't talked to her for a whole day, so jealous.
Not having a garden and not being able to sit outside because you live in an apartment
Said one of the Amayzers somewhat irritated to me. Sorry for my garden people, sorry. I sincerely apologize.
Not watching all the series and movies that others do watch
And now that you have all day to watch Vis a Vis, it’s about time you actually do it. These words were actually spoken this week.
Everyone is working out through quarantine, but you haven't done anything yet
I'm jealous of May, who suddenly runs twelve kilometers through the dunes, while I am following a lazy-people yoga class with sighs and sweat.
People who can cook incredibly well
Take our former FavorFlavje Emma, who thankfully has a cookbook in the making. But she simmers and fries and roasts herself through this quarantine and then does bartering. I dare say that no one would ever want to trade a dish with me.
That there are people whose hair sits better
And that your hair droops around your head like a dry bush because you were putting off your visit to the hairdresser for so long. Oh, and in between, of course, you try to wash it less, which apparently doesn't work.
Those people who are completely zen and have their lives in order
I was accused of this (hello Annabelle, hello Annick). They think I belong to this group because I walk at least an hour every morning. Which I am indeed fully committed to, but the rest of my day is a mess and I end up in wine. No worries.
