Back to social: “I'm already tired of the idea”

First coffee with this one, then lunch with sister, then drinks with that one and to top it off clubbing with the rest, while during the day I was also sitting in an office garden with 20 quite loud types. I did it with my eyes closed, didn't turn my hand for such a day program, and now? Now I already get tired just from the idea of having to do this. Disclaimer: no matter how much I like all those types.

I'm happy to go back to normal, but that also means that I have to go back to social. And that's not going so well. If I plan more than one thing a day, I'm exhausted. But I really mean staring at Friends on Netflix with a cotton head on the couch, so tired. People totally overstimulate me. It's a problem because suddenly everyone wants to meet in person. As in: live, physically, bodily present. I really enjoy one defined activity. I never want to go home and stay until the sun comes up, that kind of thing, but more? I already start to sigh softly at the thought.

My secret ace works for about two more weeks. I'm getting my first shot of Pfizer or Moderna on Wednesday. The RIVM says it works after about a week, so until then I'll keep the agenda nice and quiet. I just say that I need to get my vaccine first before I kiss over the terrace roll with Jan and everyone, because I don't want to challenge the situation, of course. I say this with a big smile, while secretly devising a plan.

Because what then? Is it really the intention that I throw myself back into that rat race? The one we said all year that we never wanted again. Do I have to step back into that? I also hear stories everywhere of people who are heading back to the office full-time at a marathon pace. Have we learned absolutely nothing, people? Just think about that round in the neighborhood or grabbing that coffee to go in the morning at the corner. It wasn't all terrible. 

Our southern neighbors think I have the cave syndrome. You've locked yourself up for a year and can't handle all those outside activities at all. Do you know why? It's the habit. Apparently, I've kicked the social habit so hard that I find it difficult to get used to all the fuss again. Oh well.

So if I keep postponing our appointment: it's not you, it's just me and my cave syndrome.