Amayzine

Temptation Island: the Aftertalk

temptation island the aftershow episode 7

Yesss, yesterday was another new episode of the Bertus and Delphine show, also known as Temptation Island. And what a joy it was again. Well, I say that enthusiastically, but I actually found it a bit disappointing. Way too much chatter about zodiac signs and hair without gel. We’re not watching this for that, right? But still, I did have a few points to note here and there. 29, to be precise. Let’s goooo.

1. ‘A little breakfast? With drinks? I find that really cute.’ People, I present to you: romance in 2021.

2. ‘This is what I actually want, someone who is very romantic and does everything for me.’ Just to be clear, a breakfast with alcohol ≠ someone who does everything for you.

3. HAHA. Nice one, Donna. A very deep connection indeed. That’s the best way to deal with everything: humor.

4. It’s clear to me that the creators absolutely do not want Bertus and Delphine's relationship to survive. They are doing everything they can to end this toxic situation.

5. And Bertus, to make a drama about the difference between a thong and a bikini bottom… That’s a bit of a moot point, as Joey would say. A cow’s opinion. Doesn’t matter.

6. Yes, Efrain? Lying in the pool in lingerie is what you get when you type ‘porn’? *googles porn*. Nope. Nope, nope, nooope. I get very different results.

7. But given these intense reactions, the creators might as well keep that light on every time Delphine is in the pool. How dare she. PORN.

8. ‘Aylin and I have the same zodiac sign. Yes. Super cool. You don’t hear that often.’ This. Level. People. You can really demand a bit more from your new partner.

9. But hey, who am I. Just someone who has never felt spiritually attracted to someone because of their zodiac sign.

10. Why do you want to get to know Jake better? You already know his zodiac sign, right? Apparently, that’s enough for him to judge a whole personality.

11. Yoooo, is he not doing it, Efrain? ‘Shallie is a bit prettier than my own girlfriend.’ Dude, you know this is on camera. You’re not even drunk. À la Tempa this is really disrespectful. Disrespectful. You get what I mean. Has anyone ever said that right in this show?

12. Reasons why relationships lasted this season: because someone bought a house or because someone doesn’t want to lose their job with the in-laws. Love all around.

13. Stop talking about the lack of bikinis. Why is there a taboo about swimming in your lingerie, but a thong bikini is okay? Can someone explain this to me?

14. Secretly, I really want to know what actually happened during that massage gate. Bertus, tell us which ‘salon’ this was so we can investigate.

15. Honestly, Wouter is dedicated when it comes to his sponsorship deal regarding merchandising. Could that be why he’s so rarely seen on screen, because the producers are a bit fed up?

16. Not having a single photo together and therefore not having one together on Insta… But still wanting to participate as a couple in Temptation Island. Is. Just. Weird.

17. Delphine is ice cold. She’s just ready for it. Away with those men. All men are trash.

18. I literally haven’t heard any of these guys' names before. Were they even in that villa the whole time? Who are these guys?

19. ‘I haven’t found love here. But hey, I’m not dead.’ That escalated quickly.

20. Yes, I’ve never seen those girls in my life either. I’m so invested in Temptation, but apparently, I need to pay a bit more attention.

21. Donna talks more about sweat during yoga than about anything else, but still, she feels a certain click with that guy. That’s impressive.

22. Jesus, all those guys end up in a huge crisis because of a yoga lesson. What a drama queen.

23. Bertus going full throttle I find low key hilarious. He’s seriously taking on everything just to cause a ruckus. Does Delphine find it sour if I do this? Great. DO IT.

24. Kampfizzle tiiiiiime. This is going to be really dra-ma-tic. Monica can give a disclaimer that it’s a snapshot, but they’ll forget that after two seconds.

25. See: for the creators, Wouter is just not participating anymore. There must be something behind this.

26. By the way: what’s going on with all those subtitles? Typos everywhere. Now I know I’m not watching a high-level program, but the space bar has been forgotten a lot in this episode.

27. ‘I can’t even take him seriously — he hasn’t even done his hair. If he had done his hair, I could take him a bit more seriously.’ GIRL. What are you saying. He finds another woman more attractive than you, but hey: no hair, no biggie.

28. What a lame cliffhanger this is. Is next week going to be really juicy?

29. And Twitter? Yesss, that went off again.