The All You Need is Love Christmas special is nothing compared to this: I am with my mom

When I waved her off at Schiphol, I felt it already: our lives will never be the same again. Her life not, my life not, my sister's life not. My mother bought her dream house in Spain and went to emigrate with her great love. That is scary, both for her and for those who stay behind. Sometimes living from your heart also means making choices because something feels good. Because you think it is the right direction, without knowing in advance what exactly you will get back for it.

One of my best friends recently wrote to me: ‘What your mother shows you is what she wishes for you. Go for happiness. Your own happiness. Not meant selfishly, but how life is meant to be.’ And the longer I thought about it, the more it seemed to make sense. You can be there for others, but does that mean you don't let your biggest dreams come true? No. That would mean you love someone else more than yourself. An inspirer changes lives by doing. Doing it themselves. Showing it from their own life. Sharing energy from their own happiness.

That is exactly what my mother did the day she went to Spain. Choosing love through her fears. Like a true inspirer, hoping that her daughters would come to visit her soon. That ‘soon’ took exactly six weeks. If it were up to me, that would have taken way too long, but hey, we are in a pandemic. It was weighing the pros and cons. Am I going to do it? Can I make it? And then even the culprit ‘what would others think of this?’ peeked around the corner, I decided to choose for myself. My own happiness, just like my mother. The ‘stay home as much as possible advice’ no longer applied, because where mom is, there is my home.

And so I arrived yesterday at the airport of Alicante. Surprising my mother for Mother's Day. It seemed like a great plan. I only told Gary, who picked me up from the airport under the pretense of ‘I need to go to the accountant.’ When we arrived at the house, I felt my heart rate shoot up. How will she react? How will she react?! How will I actually react? We are definitely going to cry. Hug. Drink wine. What would the pool be like?

We park the car in the street and it is the first time I see the house my mother has fallen so in love with that she was willing to burn all her ships behind her. I understand it immediately. It is beautiful, even from the street side. We stand in front of the large wooden gate. Gary calls my mother: ‘Truuuud. Come help unload. It's heavy!’ The gate opens and I look straight into my mother's face.

Her mouth opens slightly. I see her expression go from surprise to disbelief to emotion. I look at pure love.

Mom, I'm home.