This is the number one rule if you want to date someone

Last week I already wrote about the phenomenon of ‘dating burnout’, which was quite an eye-opener for me. Dating has never really been my thing personally, so especially after my heart was broken, I find it quite tough to suddenly get back into that market. But okay, let's say you're ready for a new love and you're completely date ready, and by that we mean to really date with the intention of building something serious, what should you take into account?

According to psychologists, it's actually just one thing. The most important rule if you want to date someone. And it may sound logical, but there is much more behind it. The number one rule is...

Date someone who is actually available.

What? Yep, that sounds as clear as day, because dating someone who is taken usually doesn't end well. However, that's not the only thing meant by this. Of course, you need to ensure that someone is not in a relationship when you start dating, but there are several forms of availability you need to consider, such as the five things below.

Number 1: if someone is in love with someone else/broken-hearted, that person is not available
Emotional availability is of course also a thing. So when someone is purely dating to get over someone, that person is not available. So don't get involved.

Number 2: if someone is addicted and/or obsessively focused on something, that person is not available
This could be an addiction to alcohol, drugs, or something else, but it could also be an obsession with something that person clearly still needs to work on, such as an obsession with food or excessive drinking.

Number 3: if someone is extremely afraid of something, that person is not available
If someone has extreme abandonment issues, that person is not available for serious dating. Also, someone who is terrified of truly letting go of their previous relationship is not available. So not date material.

Number 4: if someone is already in a relationship, that person is not available
Well, we already covered this one: as clear as day.

Number 5: if someone tells you they are not available, that person is not available
Sounds so logical, and yet people often don't want to listen to you. People almost always want to tell you what they want, but that is just not always listened to. So no, don't try to ‘fix’ someone or ‘change’ someone. Believe someone when they say what they are.

Source: PsychologyToday