Why do people so often give unsolicited advice for heaven's sake?

‘Every day walking during your break would be good for you’ or: ‘Waking up later is better for your sleep’, and those are just two things I got shoved into my face last week. Unsolicited advice, who doesn't know it? I dare to say that the more colleagues you have around you, the more well-meaning (but still unsolicited) advice you receive. The funny thing is that all that unsolicited advice is not given to make you feel better, but as a pat on the back for the one giving it. Huh?

The delightful thing about all that unsolicited advice is that you kind of ask for it yourself. Not literally of course, because then it wouldn't be unsolicited, but indirectly. You mention that you're struggling with a lack of daylight because you're on your laptop all day, the (unsolicited) advisor gives a tip to get you outside. It's a quick fix, not for you, but for the giver. Tidied up/solved looks nice.

According to Quest, there are three reasons why we scatter all that well-meaning but annoying unsolicited advice so generously: 1) Those who give advice feel better than the other. I find it silly, but apparently it's true. 2) The advisor feels like a good person because he/she/they take a moment to consider the misery of the other. God, what a great person. 3) So that's the quick solution, because we gladly provide that.

The sensitive thing about all that advice is that it often wraps criticism as wise counsel. The giver thus feels better about themselves and you clearly do not, but they also saddle you with an insult wrapped as a tip. When you think about it, you just get angry. I can decide for myself when, where, how long, and why I go for a walk.

The next time someone comes with such an annoying piece of unsolicited advice, you could ask if the advisor feels better. That will surely cause some confusion because you're in a bind, but according to Singapore Management University, the giver actually feels better. And if not, then you've just slyly made it clear where the person in question should stop giving that advice. Also nice. Preferably somewhere where the sun doesn't shine, indeed.

Source: Quest