Dating Disasters: ‘Minutes passed until I realized he was already almost half an hour late’

In Dating Disasters, anonymous readers share their most embarrassing, cringeworthy, and dramatic dates. This week: No Show Niels.

I met Niels during a night out. I had seen him before, but he had never seen me. How could he, he was always surrounded by women. In the weeks leading up to our meeting, I often observed that scene from a distance. He looked great, but there were better-looking men around. What was so special about Niels that he was adored by half of the bar?

I found out when Niels approached me a few weeks later. I was pretty much the only one who wasn't swimming around him like a piranha (that behavior is really far outside my principles), so I must have caught his attention. We chatted, danced, and he treated me to drinks and compliments for the rest of the evening. Not in a slick way, he seemed to really mean it. It also helped that I felt the jealous eyes of the other girls burning into my back, but Niels became more charming by the minute. Because I had such a fun evening with the trophy of the bar, I felt invincible.

Niels and I decided to exchange numbers so we could stay in touch. I wondered aloud how many numbers he had scored on a night like this, but he chose to answer that question with just a charming smile. I flew home on clouds. That such a sought-after man liked me seemed almost too good to be true.

And it was. A day later, the misery began. Through Instagram, I found out that he followed pretty much all the women living within a twenty-kilometer radius, and the flashy photos he posted were honestly quite a turn-off. Of course, I hadn't taken off my rose-colored glasses yet, so I decided to expertly ignore these discoveries and text him.

Our texting was terrible. I had to wait hours and sometimes days for a response, and all his messages had the same teasing, almost insulting undertone. This only made me seek his approval more by responding to his messages faster and more eagerly (I know, I'm putting myself in the corner for this embarrassing behavior). When he finally asked to meet up, I even felt a ‘yes, he likes me!’ rush through me. Had I wondered in the meantime if I even liked him? I don't think so, I was too blinded by that one amazing evening.

On the agreed day, I waited for him at the place where he wanted to meet. It was a spot around the corner from a long street full of cafes, and although I thought it was strange that he wanted to meet on a corner instead of in a cafe, I did what he asked. Minutes passed until I realized he was almost half an hour late. With frozen fingers (it was the middle of winter), I texted him to ask if he was almost there. Minutes passed, and when those minutes turned into almost an hour (okay, I was standing there way too long, but I kept wondering if I had mistaken the place or time and didn't want to miss him), I decided to go home. I was completely done with this man.

I didn't hear anything from him for the rest of the evening, until he sent a message the next day saying, ‘So, my phone is working again. How are you?’ What a weirdo. He acted as if nothing was wrong. Looking back at our contact, I understand that he thought I was dumb enough to respond normally to this; I had never called him out during our conversations. Still, I drew the line here and decided not to respond.

I saw him one more time after that. Months later, I was in a cafe when a bottle of wine was sent to our table. It came from Niels, who was sitting a bit further down the bar. Show-off, I thought. I'll get you. He waved friendly while I, without breaking eye contact with him, handed the bottle to the table next to us. He may have made me wait like a fool, but the look he had when I did that was worth it a hundred times over.

Do you want to share your Dating Disasters with us too? Great! Send an email to info@amayzine.com and maybe you'll read your story here soon.