According to science, we all go through these three love phases
Look, my favorite subject: love. Ironically, I love writing about it, probably because there is zero point zero romance happening in my own life. Writing about love is my last piece of reassurance that it actually exists, and that it will undoubtedly happen to me again. When, however, is still the big question. According to science, it should depend on your life stage. There are three stages, and in each stage of your life, you encounter a different kind of love. Let me explain.
The first love
This first infatuation feels like a fairy tale. It is that all-consuming puppy love, and at that moment, you are convinced it will last forever. Often, you experience this during high school and it ends because two people grow apart. This love is usually a bit shallower, with more emphasis on how it looked to the outside world. That deep connection, which you normally experience at an older age, probably wasn't there, although you may have felt it that way. Moreover, this heartbreak hurts a lot. It is the first time your heart is broken and it feels like you will never get over that person.
The intense love
After this comes the second, more intense love. This infatuation often arises in your early 20s and turns your life completely upside down, it feels that intense. During this relationship, you are held up a mirror: all your insecurities, needs, and desires come to the surface. It is during this intense love that you deal with jealousy, fear, and doubts about yourself. The relationship has enormous highs, but also plenty of lows. This is the kind of love that feels like a rollercoaster that can suddenly be over one day. The grieving process of this relationship takes a very long time, sometimes years, and goes with ups and downs. But it is also through this sadness that you grow and change as a person.
The unconditional love
After you have healed from your intense love and developed enough self-love, the unexpected infatuation comes. One that you do not see coming at all, but is more than welcome. From the first second, everything flows naturally and no cat and mouse games are played. It just goes easily, and when you are with them, you feel at home. You feel more yourself with them than ever before, and you motivate each other to become the best version of yourself. When something happens, there is no more uncertainty because you know that you both want to work on it together through your shared vision of the future. Once you have found that unconditional love in someone, the chances are high that you will grow old with that person.
What stage are you in? I am eagerly waiting for the third stage.
