Psyche

5 reasons why your New Year's resolutions fail (according to psychologists)

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woman with a bottle of wine and bathrobe in the kitchen

For years I have been planning not to come up with good resolutions, and ironically enough that is also the only good resolution I have managed to keep. But I have the idea that I know what it is: I take it on in the wrong ways.

Because according to psychologists there are five pitfalls with our good resolutions, and I can tell you that I am guilty of all five. Yes, that’s why it hasn’t worked for all those years to keep one… So make sure to remember these five things well.

1. Wanting too much at once
Good resolutions are of course always a nice plan, but if you have about 30 of them, you mainly create stress for yourself and none of them succeed. That’s why psychologists recommend starting with small steps: one good resolution at a time. But even if your good resolution is a big change, it’s wise to take it easy.

2. You take it too broadly
Try to make your good resolution(s) as specific as possible. For example, do you want to lose some weight? According to psychologists, that is way too broad; resolve to go exercise twice a week, or have lunch with soup or bread three times a week — whatever you want, as long as it is as specific as possible.

3. You do it alone
It always works better to have a stick behind the door. For example, do you want to exercise more? Find someone to go with you, so you are more likely to stick with it.

4. You are too hard on yourself
To stay on the topic of exercising: did you miss a session? Don’t be too hard on yourself. It can happen, and it’s okay — it’s not like your whole good resolution has gone to waste. Just tackle it again with renewed courage.

5. Only living in the ‘now’
Carpe Diem sounds really nice, but if you always live in the ‘now’ you are less inclined to consider the consequences. Therefore, always try to look ahead. For example, do you want to quit smoking, but think ‘oh, one today doesn’t matter’? Then think about how disappointed you will be in yourself tomorrow, and how proud you will be if you have still managed to do this in a month.

Source: PsychologyToday | Image: Netflix