Why you should watch out for penny dating
Yes, it's time for yet another dating trend to watch out for. As if the singles among us don't have it tough enough already. Still, I feel compelled to warn you about the trend that is sweeping through the modern dating jungle like a tornado according to TikTok: penny dating. In this way of dating, a person first invests a lot of time, effort, and resources to pique your interest, after which they strategically reduce their involvement to minimal efforts. This is called penny dating because it seems like your date ultimately just tosses a quarter into your situationship to keep things warm. So frustrating and such a waste of your time.
Here's how penny dating works
Penny daters go all in for their date at first. Sweet words, gifts, and thoughtful dates: no expense or effort is spared. This is where the mindfuck begins, as you assume that someone only does this if they really like you. That is indeed the case, although penny daters can't maintain this for long. After hooking their partner, there is a gradual decrease in this investment, but often you don't notice it right away. To maintain interest, there may be temporary splurges that make you think you're exaggerating when you point out that it seems like your date is pulling back, but these generally remain below the original level.
When dealing with a penny dater, this fluctuates in an up-and-down pattern, with the level of effort decreasing each time. For example: after a period of 100 percent investment, this can drop to 80 percent and then to an even lower level. Eventually, the point is reached where the investment is only a few percent, equivalent to a few ‘pennies’. Because you know how it can also go (after all, you've seen that your date could go all in for you), it's very difficult to detach yourself from this person. The danger is that you keep hoping it will be like it was, while that is no longer going to happen.
The solution? An open and honest conversation where you indicate what you do and do not seek in a relationship, and that if your date cannot meet this, it might be better to part ways. It may sound harsh, but who nowadays has time for minimal effort and maximum frustration? Exactly: no one at all.
Source: Psychology Today
