Just about Dianne, Tygo Gernandt's ex

Dianne van Engen, Tygo's ex-partner, has shared her story about what happened between them. The allegations are serious: physical and sexual violence. The case deeply affects me, as does the way this conflict is being fought. Not only in a safe, professional environment, but on the pages of a gossip magazine. As if it is not enough to be accused, Tygo is now also condemned in the public arena, without being able to defend himself.

I find it intense to see how defenseless men can sometimes be. Because let's be honest: in a world where they are seen as strong, fearless, and sometimes even unshakeable, there is little room to hear their side of the story. It’s as if society has already made a judgment before knowing the facts. And that hurts, because those same men, like Tygo Gernandt in this case, sometimes seem to become pawns of public opinion and personal agendas.

Dianne even shared a video of an escalation between them. What I saw was disturbing, terribly dark and grim, but does it belong in the public domain? Namely in a place where both individuals are heard and weighed. A woman, what am I saying; every person must always be taken seriously when they tell their story. But here I also see a man who can hardly protect himself against a storm of accusations and stories that are becoming increasingly exaggerated.

What worries me the most is how this continued. Not only was a report made – which is powerful and necessary – but the whole story also ended up in Privé, including private messages from Tygo to another woman. And that feels wrong. Not because I want to justify what may have happened, but because this is not justice. This is public execution. What happened between Tygo and Nicolette Kluijver has nothing to do with this case, but now her life is also out in the open.

Why does this happen? Why is the boundary between justice and sensationalism not guarded? And what does it say about us that we swallow all of this as if it is normal? The only thing I can think of is how we as a society fail when we do not allow space for nuance, when we declare a man guilty without a trial.

I understand the pain and your need to be heard, and filing a report and breaking open a situation like this is brave. But there are ways to tell your story without harming others. Let justice do its work in a courtroom, not in the columns of a weekly magazine. Because if we are not careful, people are condemned without a chance to defend themselves – and that should not happen to anyone. I keep thinking; every criminal has the right to return to society. But those who are never convicted, but are thrown to the lions in the media, those people have life sentences.