Family & Friends

The 5-step breakup plan for girlfriends

By Adeline Mans | #!31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:000031#31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:00-5Europe/Amsterdam3131Europe/Amsterdam202631 18am31am-31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:005Europe/Amsterdam3131Europe/Amsterdam2026312026Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100005003amWednesday=9#!31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:00Europe/Amsterdam3#03-18-2026#!31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:000031#/31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:00-5Europe/Amsterdam3131Europe/Amsterdam202631#!31Wed, 18 Mar 2026 05:00:00 +0100+01:00Europe/Amsterdam3#

She sucks a river of energy out of you, nags non-stop, never comes to watch Netflix at your place, chats behind your back with others, does this about you and never pays. Do you have a girlfriend who scores dangerously high on these points? Then it might be time to assemble a farewell committee, because this doesn't sound very friendly.
Sometimes love is out of a girlfriend. You don't understand her as well anymore, get unusually annoyed with her, and you snap and grumble more often than you give each other a hug. Examine the friendship with a magnifying glass from every angle before you start the plan below, because usually the spirit is still in the bottle and more of those entertaining proverbs. Is your mind sure of her case? Then follow this step-by-step plan. And remember: it will hurt a little.

1. Gradually reduce contact

Cold turkey is never a good idea. Quitting a job, saying goodbye to a girlfriend, it just hurts a bit, like breaking up (that's why it's called the breakup plan). But sometimes it's better. Arrange to meet less each weekend, every week, month, etc. Then the gap is less big and she already understands a bit which way you are going.

2. Filter your conversation topics

You are used to briefing her on everything in detail, but it's better to be a bit more frugal in what you share. So that argument with your boyfriend? Off-limits. Complaining about your mother? Don't do it. Even if it feels familiar, breaking up can end badly. You don't want to have given away the most intimate details as ammunition.

3. Make sure you don't argue

Perhaps the most important thing of all. Just because you are no longer a match this year, this month, at this crossroads doesn't mean it will never be good again. So don't argue. A friendship can sometimes be put on hold and come back out of the dust just fine, as long as you haven't broken or scratched anything.

4. Think again if you really want to break up

You have a collection of drunken hours, shared tears over lost boyfriends, maybe a road trip you will never forget, and had the big conversations in das leben. So just a reality check. Are you sure the love is over? Or is taking a step back in seeing and calling each other also okay?

5. The conversation

She notices that your contact is medium, so there is a chance she will ask what is wrong. If you don't deviate from your breakup plan after my speech at four (you have to be extremely frugal with friends), then it's time for the talk. Tell her what you think and feel, but don't make accusations. Unless she dragged you out of the marital home, came up with the dirtiest gossip about you, and stole from you, then you can let loose. But otherwise: say goodbye kindly. You shared beautiful moments together.

6. Don't text her when you're drunk

You don't do it with an ex/fling/project/whatever, so don't do it with her either. Period. You know yourself that in a foggy state you sometimes still throw out a jab. That's not very nice.