what a man like David does

When I was backstage at the Victoria Beckham show, it suddenly buzzed through the makeup room that ‘Victoria herself’ was on her way. Followed by the intensely solemn sentence: “And her husband is coming too.”

Her husband. That is David Beckham. Brilliant midfielder of Man United and top scorer of the national team. The fashion audience, spoiled to the soles of their Louboutins, actually became a bit wobbly. Anna Wintour laughed like a breezy high school girl and Suzy Menkes, you know, the one from serious fashion journalism, parked all her journalistic objectivity and asked her assistant to take a photo of her and David.

I have great respect for Victoria Beckham. She has proven to be no flash in the pan and her show is one of the centerpieces of New York Fashion Week. But let's not kid ourselves, having a man like David by your side helps, you know. It helps. Thinking about it, I realized that having such a trophy man on your arm is actually the pinnacle of emancipation. Do you wish for one yourself? Keep this in mind.

I. Choose one of great fame

I'm thinking of an Oscar for Best Director, an Olympic Medal (if that is combined with overcoming a life-threatening illness like, for example, the cancer of Maarten van der Weijden or Lance Armstrong, you know you have something unique in your hands). A pop artist is also an option. David Bowie, Mick Jagger, something with iconic status please and no Pete Doherty-type. Trouble and it won't lift you up.

II. Ensure a legend in retirement

Your trophy must be available whenever you want. So if your show/book presentation/premiere is, he must of course be there neatly and on time. It can't be that you have to bend to his tour schedule. I mean duh.

III. Your legend must be with you for a long time

Easy come, easy go. So if you snag a legend for a one-night stand and then bring him along to your moment of fame, it won't work. People won't fall for that. It only bears fruit if there has been an intense, intimate relationship beforehand. Preferably with a few children as proof of true love and the necessary we-are-made-for-each-other quality.

Know what you have to do and always think “What would Victoria do?” in case of doubt.”