Happy & Healthy

6 things you should not do

This week I had an hour to spare and I took my laptop to an establishment to combine the useful (two pieces that needed to be typed) and the pleasant (a glass Chardonnay) together. Next to me sat three very charming but very old ladies spooning a advocaat. When they laughed hard, I could hear their dentures clattering. A fitting picture, until one of the ladies exclaimed; “Can you imagine that people find us old?” Uh, yes dear lady. You are old. What am I saying: very old. It made me think of the next list of things you shouldn't say.

1. Talking about yourself as if you are still young

This applies to grandmothers of 92, to women of 50 (I recently heard a 50-year-old woman say that she really still had the body of a young girl. I don't know when she last saw a body of a 20-year-old girl, but sorry, it didn’t look like hers), but also to me. I am twice as old as most people I work with. Try not to be one of them. Unless you don’t want to make a fool of yourself…

2. Saying that it is so difficult that your child is not challenged enough at school or screens with their extremely high Cito score

Great for you that you have such a super duper child, but don’t shout it at every opportunity. That is just as bad as constantly saying that you have such a problem because you can eat anything and don’t gain weight. There are people with real problems and parents of children who learn poorly or have a hard time finding their way in life. Of course, you can be proud, but also keep a little consideration for others.

3. Getting involved in marital disputes (or in disputes between friends)

A common mistake. They have broken up, she cries to you, maybe he does too, you mediate or try to mediate, they get back together, look for an evil force or cause that lies outside of them and bam, suddenly you did it and you both lost your friends.

4. Ordering advocaat

Then you are really old. Okay, it’s allowed until your twenties, but then you might as well have a bowl of vanilla custard.

5. Responding to an annoying Facebook message

I am really bad at this too, but those people who leave annoying Facebook messages want attention. And a response. If you respond, it only gets worse. Sit on your hands so you can’t type, go to a place where you have no wifi or where it’s rude to play with your phone, find a isolation cell; do something. Your anger will eventually blow over. As long as you DO NOT respond.

6. Texting about a friend to another

And then accidentally texting one about the other instead of to the other. I did that once. And then never again.