Fun & Famous

NO PLANS FOR CHRISTMAS

Like Kiki, I am team divorced. No, my own butter letter didn't get torn to shreds (hard to tear due to lack of such a letter), but that of the parents and then times twelve. You get a flying Dutchman Christmas from that which makes you anxious. And full, because you also eat twice the allowed amount.

Just not this year, because we were refusing appointments. How does that work? Just keep shouting ‘I don't know’ until everyone switches to Plan B. It wasn't intentional, but with a move on the horizon we thought that was efficient. It's such a hassle to pull the gourmet set out of the bottom box. If you forget which one it's in, you then have to unpack and repack everything. You're back in the mess. But then suddenly it was the Monday before jingle bells and there was no plan of attack, except for a cheese fondue.

You start to doubt, you know, when you've had to squeeze in a third Christmas day for thirty years to fit your family and all their attachments. Maybe we should just stop by mother 1 for brunch or have a tiny drink with father 2? Yeah, let's do that. Or? No, of course not. How cuckoo are you if you have ZERO plans and then cram everything in because it's expected? Totally cuckoo, so we didn't do that.

I texted a friend with a restaurant (they're super handy to have in your squad) to see if she maybe, possibly, accidentally still had a table for two. And yes, there was just a cancellation. This must be meant to be, MEANT TO BE kind of stuff. I booked a hotel with a bathtub at the back. We are bathtub-less, so a bath does things to you. And that tub will never fit under that Christmas tree at home. Anyways, it became a hotel room with a bath an hour from home and hearth, because you feel so far away from a hotel.

So now there is a plan, but it consists of holding hands with him, a six-endless-course dinner where you can't say boo or bah anymore, that difficult delicious wine arrangement (is at least as important as the food itself) and a bathtub. Then it will suddenly freeze and snow, and we'll take a white Christmas walk the day after. I can recommend that emptying out. And then I'll visit all our moms, dads, attachments, brothers, and sisters. Because yes, a little hug with la familia is just part of it.