Travel & Hotspots
THE ULTIMATE VACATION CHECKLIST
If you score on the 7 points, then you are in vacation mode.
I am in heavy denial that today is my last day of vacation. Although I have a daughter with homesickness who has been opposing that for two weeks now. When she wakes up in the morning and raises her left eye a bit, the very first thing she says is: ’How many more nights until we go home?“
You really don’t want that, a child with homesickness. You’re floating on your air mattress, a glass of wine in sight, a chill tune on Spotify, overlooking the bay of San Antonio (now San Antonio is very ugly but our house is so high up on the mountain that I just look over that ugly mess and only see the most beautiful sunsets), you’re just about to say how amazing and fantastic it all is and then your daughter says: “I don’t like swimming pool vacations.’ That.
But aside from this little detail, I think I’m doing incredibly well at enjoying my vacation. My belly button is sunburned (I’ve never managed that before so I’m proud of it), my hair looks like Ruud Gullit’s due to sun, sea, and wind (sorry Leco) and I have a sore neck from swimming with my head above water (because of Leco) which doesn’t really work (sorry again), resulting in both bad hair and strange muscle pain. But anyway, to check at the last minute if I’ve landed in the final vacation mode (and hopefully you have too), here it is, rapapaa: the ultimate vacation checklist.
1. You have Hollywood-worthy dreams
Kidnappings, abductions, new cities that need to be built under your leadership, parties with Orlando Bloom (naked of course), and a new world order. You come up with it while lying down.
2. You find lunch at 4 PM the most normal thing in the world
Just like dining at 8:30 PM and waking up at 10:00 AM. And that your children (if you have any) only go to bed at 10:30 PM instead of the usual 7:30 PM (which actually never works… don’t tell anyone). You all take it very Mediterranean lightly.
3. You suddenly realize that you didn’t put on any makeup yesterday
You were lying by the pool and from the pool came lunch and before you knew it, that turned into dinner. Now you actually don’t need any makeup because you’re relaxed and tanned, so nothing to worry about.
4. You’re not wearing any underwear
Not because you’ve suddenly become a member of the naked running & co, the idea, but you put on your bikini bottom in the morning and that doesn’t really come off anymore. Sometimes you even sleep in your swimsuit. But you mustn’t tell anyone about that.
5. You have a vacation language
Or vacation jokes. With each other. All in the category you-had-to-be-there-to-understand-it. So I’m not going to share ours with you.
6. Flip-flops are your best friends
You started off well, brought some lovely heels for the evening. But they were too high and too warm. And actually, you felt totally out of place among everyone who had apparently been on vacation for a while. They were all barefoot or at most in sandals. So your heel became a lovely leather sandal, that sandal became an espadrille, and the espadrille became a flip-flop (this to be precise). Actually, you’re just a small step away from being barefoot, but to reach that state you need another two weeks of vacation.
7. You start dressing like a local
Of course, you have your own style and usually think long and hard about your outfits. But just like you’re going to find the local liqueur the best in the world (while you wouldn’t even touch it in the Netherlands, bet?), you also adopt the local style. If you’re in Greece, you suddenly start wearing lace-up sandals with white tunics, in the south of France (take a look) you suddenly appear in a faded blue and white striped nautical look and I here in Ibiza have indeed already bought a beaded necklace with feathers and a cowboy hat.
I score on all seven, so I think it’s about time to go home. My daughter will be happy with that….
