Everything you want to know about the wedding ceremony
(with inside info from Dirk Zeelenberg)
Just eight more nights to sleep. Meine gute, I'm already feeling anxious. Then I will stand in front of two of my dearest friends, family, and associates to marry them. With the whole 'I declare you' event. That's why I called Dirk Zeelenberg, because he is not only an actor but also a wedding officiant and the author of the brand new book Ode to Love. Of course, we want to know the details.
First of all, your book, tell us everything…
“The stories I encounter as a special officiant during the pre-wedding conversations are not something I want to keep to myself. In Divorce, I have been able to play wonderful and remarkable situations, but in real life, they are even more hysterical and touching. It’s not just a book about what I do as a wedding officiant, but it’s really about love. Every year, 25,000 people get divorced. That’s why I wanted to share that the spark can suddenly ignite even at the butcher’s and what love can do.”
Is there one that stuck with you?
“Yes, I married a man who works on the ambulance. He took 300 guests to Dubai to get married there. When I asked him about the costs, he told me that he once developed an app and became rich from it. After that, he chased his dream, and that’s why he now drives an ambulance. Amazing.”
You also talk about mothers-in-law…
“There are even people who have fled abroad so that the mother-in-law cannot be there. Indeed. But also those where an ex is sitting at the back of the hall or is even a witness to a new fiancé. A blended marriage can also be very beautiful. I married a couple with eight children, three from one and five from the other, but the friend group disapproved. However, the children got along so well with each other already. Then you lose your husband and children. I hear the most touching stories.”
Actually, I could really use your advice. I’m marrying two friends next week, what’s the secret to doing it well?
“How nice. You know them very well, which makes it very personal right away. I always create a love document. Make sure it’s funny and touching in a tasteful way. It’s a love story. Just trust that it will be fine, that’s much more important than being nervous. From that moment on, it should become their best day every day. And of course, there should be something to laugh about.”
If I could take a lesson from you as an officiant, what would you say?
“The ceremony is the most important part of the day. Everyone knows a lunch, party, or drinks, but the ceremony brings it all together. Be sure to say something about the witnesses, provide fun background information, and put people in the spotlight. Parents love it when they are thanked for their youth. And let the bride and groom say something to each other just before the ”I do'. That’s such a beautiful and happy moment and it creates emotion.”
Who do you prefer to marry?
“I have a lot of requests and I pick the most fun ones; from a contractor from Diemen-Zuid to an internet millionaire who is getting married in Rio de Janeiro. The one in the backyard in Hilvarenbeek is just as fun, the amount of money doesn’t mean it makes your wedding more enjoyable.”
Okay, future brides and grooms to be, fellow officiants, and wedding planners… I don’t know what you’re doing, but I’m going to order Dirk's book now. And also take a look at his site, because he also has a nice surprise for you.
