SUMMER BUTT OPERATION

Part 2

Let me start this post with the deeply philosophical question: is it okay to feel sorry for yourself when you’re in pain after a plastic surgery procedure?

Yes, I know there are plenty of counterarguments. Like: it was a voluntary procedure, so you shouldn’t complain. And: there are people who are in pain after an appendectomy, they are the ones who are really unfortunate. Or: do you call this pain? Giving birth, that’s real pain.

Anyway, it’s a day after my Cellfina treatment and my butt is bruised and swollen. And if you think: that can’t be that bad; no, it really is! My husband was even completely taken aback when he saw it (he immediately went to make breakfast in bed out of pity, so that was a plus). And also this: there’s still blood and -here it comes again- wound fluid coming from the spots where a dimple has been removed. It was so bad that I drove to a friend who is a midwife yesterday to get postpartum mats so my bed wouldn’t get covered in grossness.

Can I complain a bit more? I can’t ride a bike! I can’t sit on the toilet, because do you have any idea how hard a toilet seat feels on your battered thighs? And I don’t dare to wear light pants (and I just happened to have bought a very nice light gray pair of trousers from Samsøe & Samsøe that I really want to wear). So now I have to use the scooter or Uber all the time and I can also forget about exercising for a while. I love biking and exercising. Soon I’ll lose my cellulite, but I’ll have gained three kilos because I can barely move. And I feel like an old lady when I sit down on a chair with controlled breathing.

There are a few other women who have also just undergone the Cellfina treatment. They apparently went out to dinner that same evening and one of them got on a plane the day after. How is that possible? I don’t rule out that it’s just me and that I’m a wimp with a hypersensitive derrière, but I really find this quite challenging. It even annoys me a bit that it was treated so lightly considering it’s quite a serious procedure.

That was the complaining for today. And to answer the question of whether you can feel sorry for yourself after plastic surgery? Not really, but I’m going to do it anyway.

Now for the good news: I have the impression that those dimples are really completely gone. Completely gone! But well. Time will tell. For now, I’m sitting on a cushion. With a towel on it. And I’m fantasizing about short skirts and high-cut bikinis.

Two months later:

One thing has become clear to me. I am not someone who reacts well to invasive procedures. My body DOES NOT want to be poked, prodded, or cut into. Where others were just a bit bruised and sensitive for two weeks, I had severe bruises for weeks and to this day the tissue in my buttocks and thighs is still a bit sensitive. I almost regretted the procedure until I saw the before-and-after photos…

Yesterday I went to Doctors Inc. for the final check-up. They took photos of my butt. You don’t often look at your own backside, especially not in bright light where you see EVERYTHING (and I highly advise against this), so I actually had no idea what the result was.

Doctor Jani showed me the photos. I was shocked when I saw the photos from before the treatment. It had been that bad. Because I love myself, I’m not going to say ugly things about my former backside, but let’s just say this: it wasn’t pretty. And then I saw them; my butt now. As if I’m eighteen again. Seriously. They have become rounder and there are no dimples to be seen. My thighs are also smoother. I almost asked for a print of the photo to put in my wallet. But I’m really super happy with this!

Conclusion: you can do something about your cellulite. If you’re a bit tough, it’s manageable. If you’re a sensitive type like me, it’s quite a procedure. But a round smooth butt is just for sale at the doctor’s.