Have you had the question yet?

What you do for Christmas, yes

Summer is over, everyone is back at the base and we can just go back to being normál again. Suddenly I get the question, somewhere between early and mid-October, the question I always navigate around with hmmm’s and aaaah’s. In a cowardly attempt to not give an answer yet. What are you doing for Christmas? My heavens, people, I’m just getting back into the home-garden-and-kitchen rhythm, give me a break.

That question does things to me. First of all, I want to hide, because with twice divorced parents we have a thick fat bonus to deal with. While I hide, my mind is already flipping through the agenda to check which parent we can fit into which timeslot. Mom in the morning, dad in the evening, oh no, a switch, because of the brother. Meanwhile, my hand scrolls through the KLM deals to see if we have an escape, in the form of a ho-ho-holiday. Just send Santa back with that sleigh and take that tree with you too.

Actually, it’s a shame, because I really enjoy Christmas. Correction: I find the time before and after Christmas very cuddly. Candles on, binge a bit of The Lord of the Rings, tree with lights, cheese fondue on the table, getting fat. It’s my forte. But the obligatory character, that gives me the creeps. Suddenly let me enjoy a five-course meal at my mother-in-law’s and I’ll open another bottle of wine. Because hello: ge-zel-lig. Give me a day, a time, a dress code, and three more parents on the agenda and I’ll start hyperventilating.

Two years ago, my beloved and I went out to dinner together, a little hotel (WITH A BATH!), a book with us, crackling fireplace; the whole shebang. How reláxt it was, relaaaaxt. The night before a little cheese fondue at one, the day after spontaneously joining for leftovers at the other and having a little after-drink at the next. It wasn’t planned, they were over the moon that we were there anyway and I wasn’t running around like a madman on Christmas afternoon to grab all sorts of nonsense. Give me that this year. Peace on earth, goodwill to men.