It is true: your relationship changes when you are pregnant

Mr. walks in through the door and smiles. Just like that. He says something sweet and kisses me goodbye for longer than 0.351 seconds.

The man of the house is happy. He is becoming a father and finds everything wonderful. I believe he would have preferred to have had three already. But now that I am pregnant, he couldn't be happier. My feeling of happiness is sometimes a bit lost in all four billion hormones, but that's okay. I find it sometimes especially exciting, he does not. I worry, he does not. I sigh and cry and doubt, he watches football. He reassures me and that is very much needed.

I am often asked by acquaintances, colleagues, or friends: ‘Is it different with Billy now that you are married?’ Well, uh, no. Actually not. Yes, we are happy, but we were already. We have been able to live off that white bread for a tight month or two, because then the positive pregnancy test came blowing in. And so the next question popped up: ‘Is it different with Billy now that you are pregnant?’ Yes. Definitely.

We are a bit kinder to each other. Calmer, too, logically. But a bit sweeter, tamer, clingier. Even more in love, I think. It’s nice to have a moment like this, because in about five months we will be father and mother. Our life will never be the same again. In fact: we will never be able to just be clingy together again, because two are on the way. Just like a full house. Just like a whole family. Where he is jumping, I still sometimes doubt all the unknown and new. I still sometimes long for the old life, which is already far away now. He understands my sometimes intense emotions. He drives me to work, to the doctor if necessary, doesn’t miss a single ultrasound. He listens and tries to participate in everything. That helps. Of course, I have to do it mostly myself, this pregnancy, but it feels much less lonely.

And so I am actually quite happy during this time that we are so different. I peak and dip and cry and hop – everything mixed together. He is calmer, more controlled, more practical – a real man. He provides calm in a house where hormones are raging. He provides a relaxed view of the future, that perspective that I sometimes miss. Six girls or four boys; he is always happy. I can learn a lot from him.

I also don’t want to be too clingy, but when I recently peeked at him while he was sleeping, I thought of only one thing: ‘I can do this, this double pregnancy. But only because you are here.‘