Melania voor president

The rumors are getting stronger. A divorce between Melania and Donald Trump would be a serious option. And that dear people, that would be the best news of the day for everyone.

Imagine you are Melania. A beautiful woman from a disadvantaged background. She spins it so that she has indeed studied and was a huge trophy, but we know better. If you have to lower yourself to her third-rate erotic pictures, you are desperate. You have the chance to eat from a golden plate forever if you marry a rich American. Her flaws and annoying pointing finger were on the ‘con’ list, but on the ‘pro’ list: living on the edge of Central Park, being able to bathe in Gucci blouses and sipping champagne all day. How bad can it be?

You have a child together and you want the best of the best for him too. But then it turns out that strange little man is a jerk. The one who grabs women ‘by the pussy’. The one who had a relationship with a porn star while you just gave birth to your son. And as if that wasn't embarrassing enough, you find out that he also paid her one and a half hundred thousand to keep her mouth shut. And he doesn't do that for you, of course. No. The public morality is much more important than what you think about it.

“A divorce between Melania and Donald Trump would be the best news of the day for everyone.”

And one more thing. You weren't looking forward to that stupid presidential adventure at all. Not for you. Not for you two. Suddenly you had to leave your penthouse on the top three floors of your Central Park palace and move to that messy White House with all that old furniture. And if you fill it with Christmas trees, which you always do, everyone will come down on you.

And that annoying stepdaughter of yours, who is so smart and so chic, suddenly becomes a hundred times more important than you. Just like her man. Although he now has to take a step back. Ha, serves him right.

And then those tweets from your husband. You are utterly ashamed. How bad can it be without all this? You don't have to worry about your alimony and a whole (well, at least three-quarters) of America will applaud for you. And the rest of the world too.

Come on Melania. You've already taken the first steps. You didn't Instagram a photo of you two together when Donald was president for a year. You didn't go on trips with him. Now you've canceled another important trip to Davos. Listen to this sentence: What if I fall? But Melania, what if you’ll fly? I’m so sure you will.