Relationship at work?

I first studied General Literature and then Film and Television Studies, fields that were mainly pursued by women. In addition, I did ballet, where if there was anything of the male kind to be found, they were certainly not interested in the woman. It was a rather lukewarm period romantically speaking, I must say.

But then I started working. In TV. All men. And nice ones, once again. From cameraman to creative director; let's just say I was able to straighten out the years ahead of me quite well.
These affairs usually did not lead to trouble, because they might work at the same company, I had little to do with it business-wise, and we weren't in each other's way.

Until I saw my true love. We had occasionally made some indirect movements towards each other that also sadly failed, but now he became my direct colleague; together we led RTL Boulevard. He walked into the editorial room and we shook hands. “We know each other,” I just said. And I liked him. Not so much that I couldn't function anymore, but this just felt right.

One day I brought him lunch (where I found it really strange that he was happy with ham on his bread), the next day he brought me tuna salad with a lot of sambal manis. We called each other every day to discuss the broadcast and if I had a fight with someone, he was always behind me. Literally.

I knew the day would come, but time would find us. So, a thick half year later, it suddenly happened and we became a we. We decided to part ways professionally. Long story short: I am an expert by experience. So here are my tips.

1. Be sure

Nothing worse than that you get involved with someone during a wild after-work drink and it wasn't worth the sin. It will definitely complicate things, so at least let love feel good enough that you can handle any negative side issues.

2. Keep it a secret

At least for a few weeks. Until you are sure how it all stands. You already feel so awkward, and if everyone is watching with big eyes... You don't want that.

3. Come up with a good coming-out plan

I first told our direct supervisors (who of course had known for a long time) and only a week or so later to the team. If you don't feel like an official press release, you can also strategically choose someone you know will take on the ‘spreading the word’ task with dedication. Then it will all happen naturally. But I do think it's a good idea to discuss it seriously with your supervisor and see if this could potentially have consequences for your work. This shows that you take your relationship, but certainly also your work, seriously.

4. Be happy

If someone knows you in a work-related capacity, they really know you. Under stress, without makeup, with a cigarette (I still smoked then and had already had two by eight in the morning. Actually three, but that sounds so bad)... If he still likes you then (I really considered that a world achievement), then you know it's all good. Falling in love when you're all dolled up in a cocktail bar is, of course, not that difficult.

Will you send me an invitation to your wedding?