Awkward moments we all experience
Just two minutes until my train leaves. I rush like a madman through the station hall, panting and weaving around the crowd. It's still there! One last sprint and then... it pulls away just in front of my nose. A full station sees me retreating with red cheeks, cursing, my pace abruptly halted and my life clearly not in order. An embarrassing moment that keeps recurring in my life.
Instead of sulking, I might as well just laugh about it. Especially today. It's Awkward Moment Day. Yep, for everyone who has ever been mortified, today is the day to celebrate all these awkward moments. And honestly: in hindsight, your embarrassing moments often lead to the best stories. And that's why: a collection of embarrassing moments that we all recognize.
Handing your phone to someone else..
…and then plop, a WhatsApp message comes in with texts like: ‘Sweetheart, I'm going to tear you apart tonight, be prepared...’ Uh, oops.
The one-or-three-kiss terror
The tilted head, the misplaced air kiss, the ensuing silence combined with the awkward chuckle: it never gets easier. The greeting kiss is outright a challenge. I've figured out by now that it's better to be the one who gives one kiss instead of three.
Miraculously not being able to use your card anymore
With a line behind you. And online banking deciding to be slow at that moment. And the cashier who says three times: ‘Yes, no, there really is ‘no balance’, ma'am!’
The mother of embarrassing things during sex: the vaginal flatulence
In other words: the sex fart. Yes, I can't make anything else of it, but when it happens, it happens and there's no stopping it: the moment air escapes from your vagina. Especially during doggy style, kamikaze positions where your legs are folded over your head or other 50-Shades antics.
The high-five that just doesn't quite work
And then just trying again. Hopeless to the max.
Sending an email to the wrong person
With just the wrong information in it. Or thinking you can forward something funny to someone else, but accidentally replying to the person in question.
Waving back at a stranger who isn't waving at you at all
And who then looks at you weirdly and gives the actual person in question a hug. Pretend. Like. Nothing. Happened.
Getting too drunk
It must have happened to you: you're at a fancy party, drinks are flowing abundantly, and before you know it, you've had way too much wine. All alone. Once, I had a very intense conversation about the eating habits of a flamingo while tipsy. Don't do it.
Oh, and there's so much more. Accidentally talking while consuming. Leaking when you're on your period. Ripping your pants or skirt. Walking around with price tags. Falling right in front of the glass office of that new boss because you sit down right next to your chair (right, Lil?). Taking a sip of your drink and missing half of it. Continuing to push against a pull door. But hey, today it's allowed, dear people. Happy Awkward Moment Day. Joejoe!
