Hey André,

Wow, that came from an unexpected corner, I must say. Bridget. I had thought of everything. Expected too, but this, no, I didn't see this coming. It colored my Sunday, I must say. Because, wow, how cozy is it there in that Boulevard studio? You should know that I once also stole the father of all my children (there are about three of them) from there (or he from me, I want to stay away from that), and so more Boulevard couples have formed. Up to marriage.

What struck me is that due to the caution in your confirmation wording (I read words like ‘investigate’ and ‘have contact’) I felt that it was more than a wild romp in the dressing room. You mentioned your children and you explicitly stated that you informed your ex and the mother of your son. I wonder how your Sunday must have been, knowing that all the group chats in the Netherlands are exploding. That one thinks you're a hero, the other thinks you're a deceiver. No place is safe for you. Maybe you drove to the beach. Hat pulled down over your eyebrows, scarf up to your nose. The phones at home. Something like that. And then you come home and cautiously check Instagram. André, I didn't look at your timeline, but apparently there was so much negativity that you felt the urge to write your own message.

That it was already over, that you no longer lived together, that you didn't cheat on Monique with Bridget. I believe you because I honestly only know the situation where you tell that you are just back together-just back apart. And when Johnny de Mol recently asked if you would still be with Monique in fifteen years, your silence lasted just a bit too long. So no one, no one, no one thought that you stepped into a bed sprinkled with rose petals every day. What my point is, you must be wondering by now, is that I believe you were apart but if that wasn't the case, then no one has anything to say about it.

You also apply for jobs without informing your current boss and love is just a bit harder to steer than your career. A glance lingers, a handshake causes a spark. It's nature. I once worked at a large publishing house. When you left there, you had to complete four A4 pages of tasks related to leaving. Hand in your laptop, email to stop your email, get a stamp for this, check a box for that... Should it be like that in love too? That you visit Monique's parents and announce that you are going to intensify contact with Bridget? Come on, stop it. I don't think I know anyone who was in a relationship with a child and who took a proper break and only then opened up to the other. Love cannot be led. It's so hard to say goodbye to someone you have loved so much that you had children together that you need a big push to take the leap.

That's difficult, but also beautiful. And if you just take very good care of the mother of your child and give her everything that makes her happy, then you at least know that you have done what you can.

I know this is hard for Monique, but let's be honest: that bumpy road that your relationship was called was also not what she hoped for in life. So I would say to both of you: live. As if it’s your last day. I think you are already doing very well with that.

Amen.