If you can check off this list, your friendship is forever

My oldest friend texts me at eleven o'clock in the evening. ’Psssst, don't tell anyone, but look...‘. I seriously almost cry and call her right away. Oh my god.

She has been proposed to and has a beautiful ring on her finger. I can hardly believe it: I got married last year and now she gets to experience it all. It's so special and I wish her all the best. I can't wait to hear those two ‘yeses’ on that most beautiful day. She will be such a stunning bride. I've known her for as long as I can remember. We played together in the doll corner at preschool and now we still have coffee or wine together every week. That's special, because not every friendship survives all the phases that are inevitably part of life.

Are your friends there for you all the way to the nursing home? If you can check off these points from the list, you're set:

1. You let each other live freely. Sometimes you have a little less time for each other and that's okay. It's part of it. That's not a dealbreaker.
 

2. You always have fun: having the giggles now and then and laughing about nothing is so nice. And important.
 

3. It's never awkward when you see each other: there's always plenty to discuss, catch up on, and gossip about.
 

4. You tell each other everything: nothing is as dull as friendships where you can't be completely yourself.
 

5. You make each other happy: real friends should give you energy. Not take it away.
 

6. You wish her the world and she wishes you the same. No room for jealousy: you want her to be happy, wherever and with whoever or whatever.
 

7. You remain genuinely interested in each other despite busy schedules, jobs, and kids. What is she doing today, how was her vacation, how did she find that weekend away with work? Sending a text with a question is a small effort and a big gesture.
 

8. You never let each other down. Of course, sometimes there's a disagreement, sometimes your lives are completely different. While you're changing diapers, she's at the bar knocking back dropshots. That's okay. But even if you call her at six in the morning when there's a panic, you know she'll be at your doorstep. You know you can count on her, forever.
 

No matter how difficult I sometimes find it that I am the only one of my best friends who already two children has; I am always happy to have them in my life. Otherwise, it would be quite boring. And I truly hope one thing with all my heart: that Bodi and Daaf will also meet such a good friend at preschool and that in thirty years they will still be having coffee and a beer with those guys.