KIKI'S BACHELORETTE RAMBLINGS: 10 THINGS I THOUGHT DURING EPISODE 9
Hoooooly shit. The episode that turned the season upside down. Fitgirl Gaby is spicy like wasabi. The girl is not angry, it's worse. The girl is DISAPPOINTED. You better run when a woman says that. ‘If you're not here for the right reasons, I ask you to leave now.’ Do I see a Máxima tear there? A Kim Kardashian ugly cry?
What went wrong here? Episode 9 was definitely one to remember...
1. First things first. Speed dating with Dennis and Monique, Gaab's parents. That voice of that father and then those glasses, I find those parents so sweet, really endearing.
2. A few things we need to talk about.
– Wow. Is this the same Boy who a few weeks ago didn't want to talk about his daughter and now smoothly rolls it out in the first sentence? Tactic switch for sure.
– And why is Gaby sitting there so super awkwardly in the background during those speed dates?
Then some gems from dear dad:
– ‘From Limburg? Jeez, it can't get any worse, right!’
– ‘Cooking? A burnout from cooking???’ Poor Joey, hahaha.
– ‘If it were a Song Festival, we wouldn't give twelve points.’
– ‘Oh, so you want to make easy money quickly?’
– (about any random city) ‘That's not Amsterdam, right?’
3. Or what do you think of this brilliant intermezzo?
Gaby's dad: ‘Jethro? Oh, I thought you said you were straight.’
Jethro: ‘Haha, I am, yes.’
Dad: ‘Yes, I hope so for you.’
4. It's delightful how everyone has their own little tactic. Or should I say TacNIEKJE? Niek is blackening Joey full-time with his potential in-laws, hahaaaa, while Jordy, the smooth boy from Mokum, scores points with Ajax and beer.
5. On to the next task. The men are going to cook in pairs for their potential in-laws. Correction: Kasper, Jethro, Boy, and Joey are going to cook. Niek and Jordy are ORDERING something? How come, you bunch of lazy bums, you guys had one job, unbelievable this and then still showing off with the presentation of those strawberries!
6. Honestly: I would hate the interviewer who manages to pull this kind of quotes out of me for the rest of my life. Niek: ‘Am I handy with an oven? Yes, I can heat up a pizza. Sausage rolls. Occasionally sausage rolls. And that was about it.’
7. That awkward moment when you hear the crickets when Jordy is saying ‘a raps’ and it reminds you of yourself when you were a child and said weps instead of wesp. #AaahLiefie
8. When Demi says on Twitter what all of the Netherlands is thinking:
What a dramatic episode about a misunderstanding, I must say.
Jethro: ‘Oh, I thought you meant kissing.’
Jordy: ‘No, I meant pecking.’
Gaby: ‘Okay, that's resolved.’
No way.
‘WHO IS THE LIAR HERE?! WHO WANTED TO HURT ME?!’
Girl, take it easy #debachelorette
9. If someone in this show says ‘you just have to look me in the eyes and then you'll know’ one more time, I'm really going to randomly attack someone with a cheese slicer. #NoMercy
10. Sorry, but I'm thinking about it again: whatdaFAK are we making it difficult for a kiss or a peck? Suddenly everything Gaab says feels a bit um, I don't know... rehearsed? As if she is presenting the show instead of participating in it.
P.S.: OMG CLIFFHANGER. JORDY MAYBE NO ROSE? JORDY NO ROSE? JORDY. NO. ROSE? PANIC. All Jordy fans gather!!!! Heart at the bottom if we think this man should continue. COME ON, GUYS.
P.P.S.: How Boy says goodbye to Gaby = my heart melts. This man... I genuinely wish him a nice girlfriend. Without cameras and bullshit.
P.P.P.S.: Want more nonsense and TV chatter? Follow me for that real lobi on Insta @kikiduren and subscribe here to my YouTube channel so you get a notification tomorrow morning when I drop a lalalaaaa exclusive interview with one of the Bachie boys who tells EVERYTHING about the kiss/peck drama...
Laaaaaater!
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