My god: I called a medium and this was the outcome

‘Kiki, can you name the names and ages of the people closest to you?’ I think for a moment and give her five names, without further explanation. Chetanya is silent for a moment and then starts talking.

‘You have a sweet side, but you don't show it to everyone. You are very selective in who you show it to. Most people see your spicy side. Be aware that you can also be misunderstood in this.’ I remain silent and nod on the phone. Chetanya is a doctor, medium, and Cultural Anthropologist (yes, quite a mouthful). The Dutch woman lives with her family in Hungary and travels the world from there to provide consultations to companies and individuals. She also gives many phone consultations. Today to me.

She tells me that career-wise I still feel like I'm not where I want to be. Great then. Of course, I'm insatiable again, story of my life. ‘I feel an enormous drive in you, but you can also be very hard on yourself. Impatience is a theme. Learn to deal with the fact that you can't do everything. Enjoy and also have respect for your accomplishments. Listen to Sander and to the people around you who see that.’

Chetanya talks for at least twenty minutes straight and everything she says is - bordering on eerie - spot on. The pessimist in me wonders if I'm an easy person to give a reading to, given that I'm already such an open book and there's so much about me to find on the internet. The optimist in me feels her wisdom and listens patiently, taking notes here and there. Sometimes Chetanya is quiet for a moment. Sometimes she asks if I find it annoying that she is so direct. I find nothing annoying. I love directness.

Secretly, I wonder if it is even possible to have a gift that allows you to sense all kinds of information about other people - without asking. Throughout the entire consultation, I try to catch her on something to confirm this feeling. But the fact is: I haven't said anything and Chetanya is talking freely. I have given zero information about myself and this woman tells me EVERYTHING about my life. About my relationship with Sander. About my persona. Also the flaws. Also the pieces that feel uncomfortable and that you would rather not talk about.

We zoom in on my character, career, relationship, family, deep desires, and even a bit of the future comes up. Without going into too much detail, this woman names things that only my best friend knows. Do I have some kind of wise Dalai Lama on the phone? Who is this woman? Can people who are so trained in ‘listening to their conscious personality’ advise others so well because they quickly sense what those who do not ‘see’ are doing wrong? Is that what a medium does? Continuously staying ahead of the rest, because they see everything earlier and can thus advise others? It intrigues me.

Chetanya continues. About my mother and father. There is a moment when her words touch me so much that I feel a tear slide down my cheek. She explains that people too often act from emotion. I do too. She also tells me how to break this pattern and how you can turn it into a new life path where happiness, love, and opportunities come to the forefront. How you dissect yourself, how you find out who you really are and how you arrive at your ‘conscious’ personality. That you can learn to understand why you have become who you are and why you can also change. What choices you need to make for that and how you can do it without too much effort. She wrote a book about it: ‘We can change, be happy and loved’.

Fucking 700 pages.
I. Am. Now. Going. To. Start.
You understand: in a few weeks I will be a different person.
Or at least: the real me.
Already looking forward to it.
Yo!

Image: Kirsten van Santen